In a previous post I talked about the men of a certain (older) age that come to me for their first man to man experience. I also see a number of guys in their 20's and 30's who want their first experience with a guy to be at my hands.
Try to understand that words like gay and straight and bi sexual are all relatively unimportant to me as they are to a lot of my clients. Many of my clients see themselves as straight, but they just happen to like to suck cock or to have something shoved up their ass. I understand what they are saying. They are willing to separate the physical acts of sex from the emotional acts of love. They would never dream of "marrying" another man. They feel a kinship perhaps with other men, no love or strong emotional attachments, but hell yes the like the sex.
In today's world of acceptance, many young men are willing to try man to man sexual contact out of curiosity about the physical acts. There is no deep-seeded longing to find the man of their dreams. Emotionally these men still love women and sexually are primarily attracted to women, but are willing to experiment with man to man contact for fun. Perhaps the religious leaders were right all along, with greater acceptance of homosexuality soon everyone will be trying it. ;-)
Michael has become one of my regular clients. He is in his late 20's, married with two daughters, is a self described "blatino" with a good body and a charming smile. He loves his wife and has a very active sex life with her. He first came to me to get a 90 min "legit" massage, he was not shy or nervous, stripping nude and using a small towel for coverage. The first half hour of the massage went pretty normal, I worked on his back and his tense tired shoulders and then lower back and hips. He did get a bit of an erection and adjusted himself a bit, apologized and I assured him it was perfectly normal. He re-affirmed he was straight but he gets aroused easily, he came to me because he thought he wouldn't get so excited getting a massage as he does from a woman. I told him not to worry about it and I finished with light touches before moving down to his feet.
I work the legs one at a time from the feet up, he calmed down and was quite peaceful. He was starting to adjust for his erection again when I worked the outside lateral muscles on his legs up to his hips. As I worked the back of his right thigh he was definitely very aroused. He spoke up that maybe we needed to stop for a moment to let him cool down, I agreed and stepped back. He settled down after a few moments and said that he was OK. I went back to the back of the thigh and when I moved to the inner thigh he came. He apologized and was worried about the table and the sheet, I told him that was what laundry was for and I slipped a towel under him so he would not be lying in his cum. I went to work on the other leg and he was much better though he did start getting aroused when I worked the inner thigh again. I moved his towel so I could work on his right butt cheek and he exclaimed "oh god!" as he came again. I finished working the back of his body and asked him to turn over and changed out his towel. He did not bother with the drape this time.
I worked his chest and abs, his cock throbbing the entire time. I worked his legs and and inner thighs his cock is dripping. He has stopped apologizing by this time. He keeps his hands to himself and his eyes closed. Without asking, I grasp his cock and stroke it twice and he cums a third time.
Since then he has been back 4 times. He never bothered with draping again. He has discovered that he loves prostate massages, 3 fingers even. He has managed to cum three times during each session. He keeps his eyes open now and talks freely about how much he enjoys how I make him feel. He has never reached for me or my cock, but he does not withdraw if my body (or clothed cock) touches his hand.
There is still no doubt that Michael is straight and loves his wife and kids and always will. He will always have plenty of sex with women. He is an extremely sexual person who has discovered that he can get his rocks off with men as well. Will he ever learn to reciprocate? Most likely. It will just take the right person.
Friday, January 4, 2013
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
Older men First time
The majority of my clients are over 40, most probably over 50. I amazed how many men come to me for their first experience with another guy at these ages.
A Hispanic man who recently started seeing me is over 60 and has been married with kids, grand kids and great grand kids. After a heart attack scare a few years ago, he decided to do those things he has always wanted to do. Spend more time with his family, travel, and have sex with men. Our first time together started as a normal massage, he laid face down on the table and covered himself with a towel. I was wearing shorts and a t-shirt and was giving him a combination of Swedish and Deep Tissue. My leg was pressed against his hand at one point and at first he withdrew slightly but then returned the hand, slowly, touching me. He eventually started to slowly move his fingers against my leg. No more. No grabbing frantically or pulling at the material of my shorts, just gentle moving - almost a tickle. I moved on to work on his legs and I worked up toward his covered butt, he shifted slightly to make room for his erection. He did not remove the towel, so I folded it to cover on cheek at a time as I worked on his glutes.
When he turned over, his erection was obvious. Not a huge cock, but definitely standing at attention. I asked if he still wanted the towel, he said no. I worked on his chest and lay perfectly still, almost afraid to move. I worked on his stomach and he again let his fingers lightly touch my shorts. I asked if he wanted me to take care of his erection, he said yes and did not move. I jacked him off, he came very quickly. I cleaned him up and finished the massage. Afterwards, I said I hope that he got what he was looking for and if he had any questions, either now or later, feel free to ask, he tipped me well and left. Within 24 hrs he made an appointment for the following week.
The next appointment he didn't bother with the towel at all. He was a little more vocal and his hips moved a lot more when I got close to butt. I tickled his rose bud and he came. I finished the massage (putting a towel down over the wet spot) and he again tipped very well. The third appointment was two weeks late, we managed to get two fingers in his ass before he came. Two weeks after that he asked to touch my cock and he came immediately. He has been coming about every other week since then and has opened up about his life and how he has always craved m4m sex but never had the courage to try it and that he loves his wife and family and would not change any of those choices but wishes he started exploring his feelings ages ago, he never knew sex could be so satisfying. He asked if I would fuck him and I stated that was against the rules. He later told me that he finally hired a chick with a dick to fuck him since I wouldn't. He didn't want to hire another guy since he just couldn't trust another guy like he trusts me. Why he could trust a transgender is something I didn't ask. He loves dick in his mouth and up his ass (he brought a dildo I can use on him during our sessions).
This in a nutshell what I like about the work I do. It is helping people. I just wish the rest of the world could see that. - Jack
A Hispanic man who recently started seeing me is over 60 and has been married with kids, grand kids and great grand kids. After a heart attack scare a few years ago, he decided to do those things he has always wanted to do. Spend more time with his family, travel, and have sex with men. Our first time together started as a normal massage, he laid face down on the table and covered himself with a towel. I was wearing shorts and a t-shirt and was giving him a combination of Swedish and Deep Tissue. My leg was pressed against his hand at one point and at first he withdrew slightly but then returned the hand, slowly, touching me. He eventually started to slowly move his fingers against my leg. No more. No grabbing frantically or pulling at the material of my shorts, just gentle moving - almost a tickle. I moved on to work on his legs and I worked up toward his covered butt, he shifted slightly to make room for his erection. He did not remove the towel, so I folded it to cover on cheek at a time as I worked on his glutes.
When he turned over, his erection was obvious. Not a huge cock, but definitely standing at attention. I asked if he still wanted the towel, he said no. I worked on his chest and lay perfectly still, almost afraid to move. I worked on his stomach and he again let his fingers lightly touch my shorts. I asked if he wanted me to take care of his erection, he said yes and did not move. I jacked him off, he came very quickly. I cleaned him up and finished the massage. Afterwards, I said I hope that he got what he was looking for and if he had any questions, either now or later, feel free to ask, he tipped me well and left. Within 24 hrs he made an appointment for the following week.
The next appointment he didn't bother with the towel at all. He was a little more vocal and his hips moved a lot more when I got close to butt. I tickled his rose bud and he came. I finished the massage (putting a towel down over the wet spot) and he again tipped very well. The third appointment was two weeks late, we managed to get two fingers in his ass before he came. Two weeks after that he asked to touch my cock and he came immediately. He has been coming about every other week since then and has opened up about his life and how he has always craved m4m sex but never had the courage to try it and that he loves his wife and family and would not change any of those choices but wishes he started exploring his feelings ages ago, he never knew sex could be so satisfying. He asked if I would fuck him and I stated that was against the rules. He later told me that he finally hired a chick with a dick to fuck him since I wouldn't. He didn't want to hire another guy since he just couldn't trust another guy like he trusts me. Why he could trust a transgender is something I didn't ask. He loves dick in his mouth and up his ass (he brought a dildo I can use on him during our sessions).
This in a nutshell what I like about the work I do. It is helping people. I just wish the rest of the world could see that. - Jack
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
So do I ever develop a Crush?
Do I ever develop a crush at all? Well, nobody is perfect. The important thing is what you do about it, or not.
Case in point, in a current production I am doing I am working with a very nice gay man, short, hairy, muscular and super sweet. He is talented and intelligent and from what I have seen, I would bet he looks great naked. So yeah, I am crushing on him a little.
Now, if I were a different person, I could explore this and see what comes of it. I could flirt, I could be blunt and say “hey, you wanna grab drink and maybe we could fuck later.” I could stroke his ego, compliment his body, his talent and make a move – I know how to play the game. All of this would of course be feeding the crush, allowing it to grow.
So I do nothing. I chit chat with him as I would with any other actor, but no more, perhaps a bit less. I ignore my impulse and feelings towards him and let them fade away. They will fade away and already have a great deal.
So, the thing to remember if you develop a crush that may jeopardize your primary relationship, the best thing to do is just ignore it, it will go away.
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
How do you Keep from cumming?
I get asked this question a lot from my clients. The shortest and simplest answer is that I am working. While I at times enjoy my work, I don’t enjoy it to the point of orgasm. Not many people do enjoy their jobs that much.
The longer answer has to do with where my focus is. My focus is not on me but rather on the client on the table. I am doing all that I can to make sure he has the best time possible so he will give me a tip and come to see me again. It’s that simple. When you take the focus completely off yourself it is really easy not to have an orgasm. Now some will argue that when they are having sex and they are trying to get the other person to have an orgasm that they themselves often cum with slightest touch. This can be very true, however I am not really having sex, I am working. If the client is jacking me, he is doing it because it gives him pleasure; I am jacking him because it is my job. All the focus is on him. Granted it helps that I am not very sexually attracted to many of my clients. The issue for me is far more often how do I get an erection with a client rather than how to keep from cumming. I am proud to say I am still Viagra and Cialis free! As I have said before on this blog, I can usually find some aspect of the man on the table that is attractive. It may be a body part or his personality, but I can usually find something. Other times I will let the client play with my penis and close my eyes and fantasize (or recall) a sexy situation. If none of it works I realize that I don’t need to keep this man as a client.
Now on the rare occasion, I get someone incredibly hot on my table, who for whatever reason is really into me. This last part is important. If the hot guy on the table is not into me, I won’t be able to maintain an erection, much less come close to cumming. So, there is hot guy on the table who is really into me and wants nothing more than to make me cum. This is fortunately rare because these are the times I have to really use self-control. If I realize that the focus is changing from him to me and I am getting close to cumming I will focus on something else, anything else. Often times it is something in the room like “I should buy some new pots and dirt and replant some of these plants” or “When was the last time I washed those curtains” or “How did that scratch get into the floor and how can I fix it.” You get the idea. It works most of the time. Have I accidentally cum? Yes. It has happened. A couple of times from the expert jacking techniques of the client, a couple of times from seeing the client shoot a huge load and once or twice when the massage went out the window and I lost all control (I can count on one hand the number of times that has happened).
It is actually one of the things I am asked to teach my clients, how to have better cum control. It can be taught. Most of it psychological, taking the focus off your penis completely and focus on the partner completely. There can be physical aspects as well and the practice can be fun, it involves hours of masturbation. Day one of training I recommend cumming as many times as you can. Block out a day and get some good porn and lots of lube and stroke it all day long. Cum as quick as you want, but as soon as you are done, do everything you can to get that erection back and cum again and again and again. For 99% of men, each successive orgasm will take longer than the one before. Give yourself a day or two of rest and then do an all-day erection. The goal is not only to not cum, but to not even get close. The only goal is to remain hard. This is not the same as edging where you get as close to cumming as possible and then stop and restart but rather to just keep your dick hard for as many hours straight as you can. Give it the occasional stroke as you do naked housework, play your favorite games, read a non-sexual book or whatever non-orgasm inducing activity you can find. At the end of the day reward yourself by giving your penis complete attention and cum as big as you can. Rest a day or two and then you can do an edging day of getting as close to orgasm as possible and then stop let yourself go soft and start over. If you accidentally have an orgasm wait a couple of hours and start again. If you go through this 3 day cycle a few times in one month, you will be well on your way to total dick control. ;-)
The longer answer has to do with where my focus is. My focus is not on me but rather on the client on the table. I am doing all that I can to make sure he has the best time possible so he will give me a tip and come to see me again. It’s that simple. When you take the focus completely off yourself it is really easy not to have an orgasm. Now some will argue that when they are having sex and they are trying to get the other person to have an orgasm that they themselves often cum with slightest touch. This can be very true, however I am not really having sex, I am working. If the client is jacking me, he is doing it because it gives him pleasure; I am jacking him because it is my job. All the focus is on him. Granted it helps that I am not very sexually attracted to many of my clients. The issue for me is far more often how do I get an erection with a client rather than how to keep from cumming. I am proud to say I am still Viagra and Cialis free! As I have said before on this blog, I can usually find some aspect of the man on the table that is attractive. It may be a body part or his personality, but I can usually find something. Other times I will let the client play with my penis and close my eyes and fantasize (or recall) a sexy situation. If none of it works I realize that I don’t need to keep this man as a client.
Now on the rare occasion, I get someone incredibly hot on my table, who for whatever reason is really into me. This last part is important. If the hot guy on the table is not into me, I won’t be able to maintain an erection, much less come close to cumming. So, there is hot guy on the table who is really into me and wants nothing more than to make me cum. This is fortunately rare because these are the times I have to really use self-control. If I realize that the focus is changing from him to me and I am getting close to cumming I will focus on something else, anything else. Often times it is something in the room like “I should buy some new pots and dirt and replant some of these plants” or “When was the last time I washed those curtains” or “How did that scratch get into the floor and how can I fix it.” You get the idea. It works most of the time. Have I accidentally cum? Yes. It has happened. A couple of times from the expert jacking techniques of the client, a couple of times from seeing the client shoot a huge load and once or twice when the massage went out the window and I lost all control (I can count on one hand the number of times that has happened).
It is actually one of the things I am asked to teach my clients, how to have better cum control. It can be taught. Most of it psychological, taking the focus off your penis completely and focus on the partner completely. There can be physical aspects as well and the practice can be fun, it involves hours of masturbation. Day one of training I recommend cumming as many times as you can. Block out a day and get some good porn and lots of lube and stroke it all day long. Cum as quick as you want, but as soon as you are done, do everything you can to get that erection back and cum again and again and again. For 99% of men, each successive orgasm will take longer than the one before. Give yourself a day or two of rest and then do an all-day erection. The goal is not only to not cum, but to not even get close. The only goal is to remain hard. This is not the same as edging where you get as close to cumming as possible and then stop and restart but rather to just keep your dick hard for as many hours straight as you can. Give it the occasional stroke as you do naked housework, play your favorite games, read a non-sexual book or whatever non-orgasm inducing activity you can find. At the end of the day reward yourself by giving your penis complete attention and cum as big as you can. Rest a day or two and then you can do an edging day of getting as close to orgasm as possible and then stop let yourself go soft and start over. If you accidentally have an orgasm wait a couple of hours and start again. If you go through this 3 day cycle a few times in one month, you will be well on your way to total dick control. ;-)
- Jack
Topics of Conversation
Some client seem to have an incredible need to talk. Very rarely will they talk about sex or why they are seeing me (some do, and I appreciate it). No, most just seem to want to chat about anything, I suppose to feel closer to me. This is not a bad thing but be careful what kind of topics you bring up. I am working on your body, and need to remain focused. You would also do well not to piss me off.
True story: A client starts going off about Barack Obama and the thought of raising taxes on the wealthy. The client had been seeing me for a long time. He is extremely over weight, never tips and is very grabby in a not fun way so he already has some strikes against him, but he is a regular and they are our bread and butter. He has told me in the past that he was a teacher and that his wife works and that he has a daughter in college. Every time I have seen him, he was always dressed in old worn out clothes and drives a big ol’ beater of a car. Anyway, he has been going off on our “communist” president for a long time blaming him for the National Debt and the job market and the housing economy and harping on raising the taxes for the wealthy. My elbows have been digging a little deeper each time, not so much that he is a republican, couldn't care less about that, but that he had so many “facts” wrong and he was speaking with such hate. I finally speak up and say, you know, he’s not really raising taxes, just letting some tax break expire and it will only affect people making over $250,000 a year so it won’t affect you at all. He responds “I know, I make well over that, it will affect me plenty.” I had to bite my tongue so I didn't yell out AND YOU NEVER FUCKING TIP ME! He then told me with great pride how he got his college aged daughter on welfare so he wouldn't have to pay for her health insurance anymore because he pays taxes to cover other people’s welfare, why shouldn't he get the benefits! He also doesn't believe that gays should serve in the military (he is former Navy) and that they should not be allowed to change the definition of marriage and don’t need the same rights as real families. He of course is not gay. No. Just ask him. He is not even bi. He just asks to suck my cock once a month, has begged me for a year to fuck him and likes my entire fist up his ass. So now I am always busy when he calls. It’s been a couple of months but he still hasn't figured it out. Do I owe him the courtesy of being honest with him? Perhaps. But why get into an argument over politics for any reason.
So here is a quick list of topics that you should keep to yourself:
1. Politics
2. Religion
3. Your children/wife
4. My partner/family
5. Any question about my business other than “How’s business”
6. Other Clients
7. How much money I make
8. My sex life
9. Racist, sexist, homophobic comments
True story: A client starts going off about Barack Obama and the thought of raising taxes on the wealthy. The client had been seeing me for a long time. He is extremely over weight, never tips and is very grabby in a not fun way so he already has some strikes against him, but he is a regular and they are our bread and butter. He has told me in the past that he was a teacher and that his wife works and that he has a daughter in college. Every time I have seen him, he was always dressed in old worn out clothes and drives a big ol’ beater of a car. Anyway, he has been going off on our “communist” president for a long time blaming him for the National Debt and the job market and the housing economy and harping on raising the taxes for the wealthy. My elbows have been digging a little deeper each time, not so much that he is a republican, couldn't care less about that, but that he had so many “facts” wrong and he was speaking with such hate. I finally speak up and say, you know, he’s not really raising taxes, just letting some tax break expire and it will only affect people making over $250,000 a year so it won’t affect you at all. He responds “I know, I make well over that, it will affect me plenty.” I had to bite my tongue so I didn't yell out AND YOU NEVER FUCKING TIP ME! He then told me with great pride how he got his college aged daughter on welfare so he wouldn't have to pay for her health insurance anymore because he pays taxes to cover other people’s welfare, why shouldn't he get the benefits! He also doesn't believe that gays should serve in the military (he is former Navy) and that they should not be allowed to change the definition of marriage and don’t need the same rights as real families. He of course is not gay. No. Just ask him. He is not even bi. He just asks to suck my cock once a month, has begged me for a year to fuck him and likes my entire fist up his ass. So now I am always busy when he calls. It’s been a couple of months but he still hasn't figured it out. Do I owe him the courtesy of being honest with him? Perhaps. But why get into an argument over politics for any reason.
So here is a quick list of topics that you should keep to yourself:
1. Politics
2. Religion
3. Your children/wife
4. My partner/family
5. Any question about my business other than “How’s business”
6. Other Clients
7. How much money I make
8. My sex life
9. Racist, sexist, homophobic comments
- Jack
Thursday, October 4, 2012
A Ritual
We all get stuck from time to time in our lives. We can't seem to find the courage to move forward or to change directions from the path that we are on. We get tied up with what has gone on before and think that since we cannot change our past, we cannot control our future.
A friend of mine suggested that the root of the problem may be that we are holding onto angst or anger at ourselves or others. We have all made decisions in our lives that we regret; decisions that may have seemed right at the time or even worse, were thoughtless. Others have that same right, to make made bad decisions and to be thoughtless. Some may have made decisions that seemed hateful and deliberate, and maybe they were - those decisions are usually made out of fear.
So even when you may not be able to understand why you are feeling so stuck in your life, sometimes it is a good idea just to let go, emotionally that is. My friend suggested the following ritual, it did make me feel better:
Fill a bathtub with nice warm bath water, no soaps but unscented salts are fine. Add white flowers- real white flowers, daisies or mums or carnations or roses or whatever you can find that are real white flowers. Strip down naked and step into the bath and soak. Let your mind wander freely with no other mental push other than "forgive." That's it, just the word forgive, over and over. Forgive your self for the bad decisions you have made. Forgive others for the bad decisions they made the have affected you. Forgive. Forgive. Occasionally pour the water over your head. Forgive.
When the water starts getting uncomfortably cool, get out and towel off. Use a strainer to collect all the wet white flowers and dispose of them with finality and purpose. They have absorbed your guilt and your anger now dispose of them. Get them away from you as far as possible as soon as possible. Don't let them sit in a trash can, but remove them from your home, flush them, burn them, bury them in a dumpster just get them away from you forever. Trust me, if they are allowed to sit even a short time, they will rot and stink up the place quickly.
You may want to follow this up with burning a little sage for a good smudging. Will this solve all of your problems forever? No. However, it may make you see how silly it is to hold onto things that have no bearing on how you choose to live your future.
A friend of mine suggested that the root of the problem may be that we are holding onto angst or anger at ourselves or others. We have all made decisions in our lives that we regret; decisions that may have seemed right at the time or even worse, were thoughtless. Others have that same right, to make made bad decisions and to be thoughtless. Some may have made decisions that seemed hateful and deliberate, and maybe they were - those decisions are usually made out of fear.
So even when you may not be able to understand why you are feeling so stuck in your life, sometimes it is a good idea just to let go, emotionally that is. My friend suggested the following ritual, it did make me feel better:
Fill a bathtub with nice warm bath water, no soaps but unscented salts are fine. Add white flowers- real white flowers, daisies or mums or carnations or roses or whatever you can find that are real white flowers. Strip down naked and step into the bath and soak. Let your mind wander freely with no other mental push other than "forgive." That's it, just the word forgive, over and over. Forgive your self for the bad decisions you have made. Forgive others for the bad decisions they made the have affected you. Forgive. Forgive. Occasionally pour the water over your head. Forgive.
When the water starts getting uncomfortably cool, get out and towel off. Use a strainer to collect all the wet white flowers and dispose of them with finality and purpose. They have absorbed your guilt and your anger now dispose of them. Get them away from you as far as possible as soon as possible. Don't let them sit in a trash can, but remove them from your home, flush them, burn them, bury them in a dumpster just get them away from you forever. Trust me, if they are allowed to sit even a short time, they will rot and stink up the place quickly.
You may want to follow this up with burning a little sage for a good smudging. Will this solve all of your problems forever? No. However, it may make you see how silly it is to hold onto things that have no bearing on how you choose to live your future.
Thursday, September 27, 2012
Sexual addiction?
Sexual addiction, is it real or is it not? I don't know, there is a lot of discussion in the field of Psychology on this very subject. The definition is one who's sexual urges, behaviors, or thoughts that appear extreme in frequency or feel out of one's control—in terms of being a literal addiction to sexual activity. One who's sexual behavior is beyond the Norm.
Who we are to judge that?
Now granted, when an obsession with sex prohibits you from functioning normally in society, it can be an issue, but is the issue with you or with society? Society's view towards sex changes regularly. What would have been considered taboo a century ago may now be normal. Sex has always been common including many "taboo" activities, they just were usually not discussed in polite society.
OK, so then why am I talking about this? Well, I wonder sometimes. I am not a bad looking man, but I am no movie star. I am now 45 years old and it is starting to show (no more passing for under 40). I have never been muscle bound and always at the top of my HWP range so a little soft around the middle. So I sometimes find it interesting when I am giving a massage and someone wants nothing more than to suck my dick or have me fuck them hard or want to massage me and get me to cum.
Now do I think all of these guys have a sex addiction? Well, honestly no. I know that guys see me for all kinds of reasons. They are not getting what they want at home either from their wife or husband (or they don't have a wife or husband) and seeing me is safe and hassle free. Some guys don't think that they are attractive enough to find their own mate so they pay me. While there are other options for masseurs, I assume that a lot take a chance with me and are willing to stick with it rather than face a bad experience elsewhere.
But there is another group that does make me wonder. When a younger muscle bound guy who could have anyone in any bar or sex club but instead pays me to give him an erotic massage.
A couple cases:
Fred is in his mid 30's, fit and trim, dark hair and lots of money. He tips amazingly well and sees me about every 6 weeks. What he wants is about 15 minutes of shoulder work then the rest of the time he wants my fingers up his ass and his mouth on my cock. This guy could have anyone anytime and yet he comes back to me and pays me to help him get off and begs for me to cum (which I don't). Each time I see him, I assume that it will be the last time since eventually he will find what he is looking for elsewhere. I mean even if doesn't want to date or have a random hookup, there are masseurs who are far more attractive than I who will give him what ever he wants. So why me?
John is about 40 and works as a fitness coach, so he is incredible shape. He also sees me about once every 6 weeks. He does like a decent massage but he also wants me to be naked and to touch and feel me, suck my cock, etc. Really? I mean again, he could have anyone and if you are going to pay, wouldn't you pay for the man you want?
Alex, a cute 30 y/o Hispanic young man, plays lots of soccer. Comes to see me once a month. Normally I would say that he is a closet case who is too afraid to look for a guy, but he is very open and out. Again, he wants to see me naked and touch and feel my body as I rub him down, he wants to suck my dick as I massage his. He loves to have my fingers up his ass and wants to make me feel as good as I make him feel. There are plenty of other guys he could choose from (and he probably does) but still once a month he comes back to pay me.
There are a great number more. It is not like I am the cheapest date in town, there are several guys who are underbidding me. I am not the most expensive either since that would generally mean I am an escort and not a bodyworker (split hairs as much as you like, I am what I define myself to be) . ;-)
So, if these guys can have whoever they want (and some of them must) then is it part of a sexual addiction that brings them back to me?
And what about me? Is it a sexual addiction that drove me to this work? That keeps me here? That keeps my cumming once a day in the evening before I go to bed?
I don't have answers, what do you think?
Who we are to judge that?
Now granted, when an obsession with sex prohibits you from functioning normally in society, it can be an issue, but is the issue with you or with society? Society's view towards sex changes regularly. What would have been considered taboo a century ago may now be normal. Sex has always been common including many "taboo" activities, they just were usually not discussed in polite society.
OK, so then why am I talking about this? Well, I wonder sometimes. I am not a bad looking man, but I am no movie star. I am now 45 years old and it is starting to show (no more passing for under 40). I have never been muscle bound and always at the top of my HWP range so a little soft around the middle. So I sometimes find it interesting when I am giving a massage and someone wants nothing more than to suck my dick or have me fuck them hard or want to massage me and get me to cum.
Now do I think all of these guys have a sex addiction? Well, honestly no. I know that guys see me for all kinds of reasons. They are not getting what they want at home either from their wife or husband (or they don't have a wife or husband) and seeing me is safe and hassle free. Some guys don't think that they are attractive enough to find their own mate so they pay me. While there are other options for masseurs, I assume that a lot take a chance with me and are willing to stick with it rather than face a bad experience elsewhere.
But there is another group that does make me wonder. When a younger muscle bound guy who could have anyone in any bar or sex club but instead pays me to give him an erotic massage.
A couple cases:
Fred is in his mid 30's, fit and trim, dark hair and lots of money. He tips amazingly well and sees me about every 6 weeks. What he wants is about 15 minutes of shoulder work then the rest of the time he wants my fingers up his ass and his mouth on my cock. This guy could have anyone anytime and yet he comes back to me and pays me to help him get off and begs for me to cum (which I don't). Each time I see him, I assume that it will be the last time since eventually he will find what he is looking for elsewhere. I mean even if doesn't want to date or have a random hookup, there are masseurs who are far more attractive than I who will give him what ever he wants. So why me?
John is about 40 and works as a fitness coach, so he is incredible shape. He also sees me about once every 6 weeks. He does like a decent massage but he also wants me to be naked and to touch and feel me, suck my cock, etc. Really? I mean again, he could have anyone and if you are going to pay, wouldn't you pay for the man you want?
Alex, a cute 30 y/o Hispanic young man, plays lots of soccer. Comes to see me once a month. Normally I would say that he is a closet case who is too afraid to look for a guy, but he is very open and out. Again, he wants to see me naked and touch and feel my body as I rub him down, he wants to suck my dick as I massage his. He loves to have my fingers up his ass and wants to make me feel as good as I make him feel. There are plenty of other guys he could choose from (and he probably does) but still once a month he comes back to pay me.
There are a great number more. It is not like I am the cheapest date in town, there are several guys who are underbidding me. I am not the most expensive either since that would generally mean I am an escort and not a bodyworker (split hairs as much as you like, I am what I define myself to be) . ;-)
So, if these guys can have whoever they want (and some of them must) then is it part of a sexual addiction that brings them back to me?
And what about me? Is it a sexual addiction that drove me to this work? That keeps me here? That keeps my cumming once a day in the evening before I go to bed?
I don't have answers, what do you think?
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