Sunday, December 4, 2011

Sharing another Blog

Hey guys and gals. A friend of mine, Jack Rinella, writes a blog and his latest post about a cheating trick is perhaps one of the best I have read in a long time, I want to share is with you. - Jack
http://leathermusings.blogspot.com/2011/12/cheating-trick.html

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Out and Proud

"I just want to say that I admire you. It is not easy to be an out and proud gay man."
These were surprising words for me to hear. They were said by a straight man who is an actor in a show I was in. I don't know him that well. We pal around on the set like most actors do. When he said it, I was standing next to one of his best friends who happens to be black. He laid into him with the whole "Oh man, you did not just say that. Really? That is just embarrassing, I am sure you didn't mean anything by it, but dude."
Awkward moment.
This sentiment was echoed by my mother in way just last week. She commented that one of my Aunts who friended me on Facebook (my more socially acceptable persona anyway) said that I was very "political" in my posts. I said I don't think so, the only issue I talk a lot about is gay marriage and after being denied the right to marry a partner of over 17 years I think most people would speak up. My mother then asked if it's been hard for me, to be gay, did it ever cause me any problems?  Wow, what a loaded question. What do you say? It's your mother.
I am an out and proud gay man. What does that mean?
Well, I proudly fight for gay marriage rights, not just on my facebook page, but also writing letters, emails, making phone calls to my elected officials. I also encourage my straight friends to do the same. I know that they want my partner and I to be able to get married, so I encourage them to do their part and make their voices known. I chat with my friends who don't believe in gay marriage and try to get them to understand that I know change is hard, but it will truly not affect their marriage or turn their children gay and God will not smite you for not standing in our way. When Civil Unions are brought up I remind people that only that only 11 state recognize any form of Civil Union, in none of them do they have the same rights and privileges as marriage and the Federal Govt. does not recognize either a Civil Union or Marriage between two people of the same sex. When I hear the phrase "It's nothing personal, I just do not want gays to get married." I reply that it is personal, you are not talking about an anonymous section of the population, you are talking about me and my partner and saying to us that we are not worthy of getting married.
But wait, there's more. When I hear a friend tell a gay joke or use the word in derogatory manor, I speak up. Sometimes quietly, sometimes loudly, sometimes with humor, whatever I think will work. My favorite line to use is "I don't think you've sucked enough dick to tell that joke." With women I will get angry, they should know better. In a social setting, if someone I don't know well says something offensive and a group of my friends are there; I walk away very poignantly so my friends can explain to the newcomer their mistake. If we do not stand up for ourselves and let others know how we feel, we cannot expect thing to change.
When a group suggests that we got to Chick-Fil-A for a quick bite, I will tell them I will pass and it is because of the amount of money funneled by them into anti gay legislation.
I share news stories from around the country of both positive and negative reactions to gay people. Stories of teenagers being beaten to death. Stories of a judge or a preacher coming out in support of gay marriage. Stories of angry mobs protesting gay marriage. Stories of a gay character in a comic book. I want to remind my straight friends that there is a struggle that is continuing every day with little wins and losses all over the place. I hope that one or two of them will write to their elected officials or perhaps speak up to their other straight friends when the topic of fags comes up.
You see, you can't be an out and proud gay man only to your gay friends. Part of the definition is that you have to be out and proud in front of straight people. There is no other way to change the world; and the world does need changing. We have come so far, but still have a long way to go.
I get concerned when I meet gay men who are not out. Not only does it help the cause, but it is a very difficult way to live. There is always a part of their lives they have to monitor and guard. When co-workers are swapping spouse stories one has to remain silent, when someone wants to fix them up with the "perfect woman" one must make excuses, and one must always choose their pronouns carefully. I especially worry if I see someone in the younger generation playing the hiding game. Life is so much easier for them now than when I was younger, but they don't understand that. The excuse I hear is "I don't want to be known as the gay guy." Great. Neither do I, but we are not there yet. So for the mean time, you are the gay guy. So am I.
Why am I so insistent on being out and proud? I am tired. I have lived through so much and I am tired of it all.
Growing up gay in rural WI it may take you a while to figure out what is going on. There were no gay people, but faggot was definitely a derogatory word. Some people guessed that I was but I didn't figure it all out until I was 19. College, even in the Midwest, can and should be an eye opening experience. I met my first out gay man. What a revelation! Still took me a while to figure it out for myself. There was a particularly rough week between the first time a friend hit on me and I did something about, but that was all inner turmoil, trying to overcome my Christian upbringing. Even this guy, my first time, in a WI college town, could not admit that he was gay and maybe he wasn't. He did fall for me and even though he dated women and eventually got married he still had sex with men and one of his girlfriends said they broke up because of me. Both he and the first out gay man I ever met are dead now.
This was all in the mid to late 80's. Aids was on the rise so there was a lot fear. There was also fear in people finding out you were gay. Many friends would drop you in an instant. There was a lot of stigma. Telling my parents was hard. They wanted to fix me and they blamed themselves, all so unnecessary.
It was rough every time I picked up and moved somewhere new. Meeting new friends and co-workers and trying to figure out if it was going to be a big deal. Some places that I lived, it was. Fortunately I did a lot of theater which has always been a more accepting culture. However, there was a whole country that was changing. Due to the Aids crisis, gay men became organized and demanded to be treated as people. Remember, there was a very real belief among many that people with Aids should be rounded up and separated from the general population. There was so much fear. I watched as families turned their backs on their own children. I watched lovers be separated from their partners in hospitals where they had no rights. I got angry as well. I started conversations, I friended the friendless, I raised money, I wrote letters and in one memorable moment stood toe to toe with the Rev. Fred Phelps on the streets of Wichita during a pride parade. He would not listen to me or even answer the simple question of what John 3:16 (one of the signs he was holding) had to do with Aids or homosexuality. Yes, we were called names during the pride parades back then. Protestors were all about.
My partner doesn't hold my hand in public. There are good reasons for it. We come from an age where two men walking together down the street (not even holding hands) would be called names and have things thrown at them. I have had rocks and bottles thrown at me by random strangers passing on the street or driving by in cars, fortunately most of them have lousy aim. I know people who have not been so lucky. To this day when I see two men holding hands in public, I marvel at the simple joy of such a small action and the amount of bravery it took.
Every time we have moved as a couple, we face to issue as to what to put on rental forms. I have no problem putting spouse or partner in relationship to other blank. My partner gets very nervous that it will cost us the apartment, it has in the past. My view is if they don't want us there, I don't want to be there.
If we try to get on the other's insurance program through work, it generally costs us at least twice as much than if we were man and wife. Auto insurance treats us as two single men and charges us accordingly.
When I worked for the government, I was told by a closeted gay man that I must not tell anyone I was gay, they can still fire you for that here and have. Gay men and women still have no protection under Equal Employment Opportunity laws. I again chose to live openly, if they didn't want me, they could fire me. When it came time to find an employee to work 10 days in Florida and 10 days in DC, back and forth for an undefined amount of time, there was no volunteering; I was told that since I was the unmarried person in the office I had to do all the travel. When I mentioned I had a partner of 7 years (at the time), the response was "But it's not like your married, you’re going." I had a picture of the two us on my desk, just our faces next to each other cheek to cheek. I was told that the cleaning lady found it objectionable and that I had to remove it or she would file a sexual harassment suit against me. I said so? The response was "You will not have our support on this, just remove the damn picture." There are many more stories from my personal life, things that have happened directly to my or to those I love.
Things are better now. My parents love my partner and consider him one of the family. I work for myself most of the time so there are less work issues. I still have to remind people when they say something stupid, including my theater friends at times. My partner will not tell someone to knock it off when he hears an anti gay joke or that dreaded phrase that follows “not that there is anything wrong with being gay” like that makes up for the stupid things you just said, so I stand up and say something for him. More businesses are now understanding of same sex couples, though others most vehemently are not.
So mom, has it been hard? Yes. Have terrible things happened to me and to those I love? Yes. Am I tired of it all? Yes. That is why I cannot stop. I will not stop. I must be an out and proud gay man. I must remind people that we are just regular people who just want to live and love in peace and be treated the same as everyone else. Has it been worth it? Yes. As tired as I am of having to be “out and proud” I know that I, and those like me, are making a difference and the world will be a better place to live. Thank you straight friend, you are right and I appreciate your recognition of my work.
An educated liberal woman I know recently said to me that things remain the same until they change and then they change rapidly when their time has come. Perhaps the most naïve and stupid thing I have ever heard her say, other than when she says her kids are really well behaved and that her dogs won’t be an issue at a picnic. Change happens when people stand up and demand it and convince others to help them. Stand up for who and what you are and demand the change that you believe in. - Jack

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Massaging a Friend


I have very few friends who are perfectly aware of what I do for a living. It is amazing that if you are an outgoing enough person, almost no one asks what you do for a living. I have several friends who have known me for years and have no idea that I have been doing massage, much less sensual work as well. Some people in my life know that I do legit massage. Then there are the few that know it all. Most of the time it is not an issue and there is usually a specific reason why they know, for example two of my best friends (a couple)  know since we take vacations with them and have played board games naked etc. No big deal.
I also do theater and again some of them know I do legit work but not sensual, since it is none of their business. The theater world is a strange entity onto itself. A group of people have this unexplainable need to take all of their spare time to get together and put on a show (with usually little or no profit). We leave our spouses and regular jobs behind and form an instant family with the good, the bad and the ugly for a few months, laughing and crying together and creating bonds that feel like they should last forever, but we know they will not. They are temporary, just for the run of the show. Oh there are some that we will stay in touch with for a while, others we will work with again on another show (no guarantees of that), and still others we leave without regrets and a very few that we actually keep as close friends. Since theater is so transitory, it is very possible that you don’t know the day job of 80% of the people that you work with. So what I do just never even enters the picture, unless someone shares something with me that I feel is worthy of my sharing with them. These are very far and few between, it takes a huge level of trust. Granted, theater people are perhaps the most understanding people in the world, but there is still a lot of stigma in doing sensual work that is just not the worth discussing.
So, I am working with an actor for the third season in a row for a few months. We don’t see a lot of each other since our schedules are very different but I was impressed with him the first year we met. He has that type of personality that is so disarming. Something he has probably developed over the years. He is tall, about 6’6”, probably 225, shaved head and a goatee so he is a rather imposing figure and his demeanor may have developed to put people at ease or it is just who he was meant to be. He is in his late 30’s, a good age for just about anyone. He is always smiling and ready with a joke or two. He seems to like everyone and everyone seems to like him. We have been able to kid each other easily from the beginning. After my first show with him closed, I let him know that of all the people I worked with that season, he was perhaps the coolest. We get to chatting on line and I learn far more about him. Something about my personality often brings out the sexual secrets in others. We share how we each like the nudist life style. He mentions how difficult it is for him to hang out naked with a 10 year old at home. We talk about his bisexuality and his relationship with his wife and their early days in the BDSM community. He shares his blog with me and I share this one with him. Suddenly we seem to have few secrets, though he has never seen my place, I have never been to his. We see each other only a few times a year and treat each other as old friends, though in reality, most of our conversations have happened on line and truth be told, there aren’t all that many of those, but they have been good ones. This is all to say that while we are friends, we are not best friends but seem better than just casual co-workers.
So after two years he finally sets up an appointment for a massage. Great! I have been looking forward to this. He really needs one due to the physical demands of his latest show and the stress of his day job and some issues at home. No problem!
Except…
Whenever dealing in a professional basis with a friend, things have a tendency to get a little gray; first off, is the discussion of money.  I charge a decent amount for what I do, I believe I am worth it, but I that is what I charge to strangers. For friends of mine I would never charge that amount. So when he asks about costs, I am honest and say what I charge every day and I give my friends a discount. He doesn’t want to take advantage of me so he offers to pay full price, I tell him it isn’t necessary and that I would rather he gets the time on the table he needs than worry about the cost, we can always work out something. He says that is fine but he likes to treat his friends well. All this and no one has brought up what type of massage he wants yet.
Cool, so I will charge him whatever I see fit. I make up my mind that he is going to get a 90 minute massage (or slightly longer) for the cost of one hour, deal with all of that later. We find an agreeable time to meet, coming to my place (a bit of a hike for him) and I arrange for my partner to be out. Not really hard to do, he wants me to make money. I do not tell my partner who my client is (they know each other), I will do that after. The discussion of what type of massage has been limited to his aches and pains in shoulders and back and legs. He knows I do sensual work as well, if he wants it, he will tell me, right? Or will he? Perhaps he doesn’t want to take advantage of me in that way either. It is true that very few of my friends who know I do sensual work come to me for it. They come for therapeutic work. This is no different right? Besides, from out talks, I know who he is attracted to, and it is not me. He likes “skater” types. The only guy that I know that he has played with is half my age, probably 6 inches smaller in the waist and at least an inch or two longer in the cock. So he is not interested in anything besides a therapeutic massage. I am sure of it.
As time for the appointment approached, I was a bit nervous, wanted everything to be just right. Candles lit, towels in the right spots, correct scents wafting in the air trying to make everything as warm and inviting as possible. Am I expecting something more to happen? No, I just want to make a good impression for my friend.  I look through my music thoroughly, deciding to go to with one of my favorite standards, an eclectic mix of Kristin Bjorn Porn music (before you judge porn music, listen to his, I find it most relaxing). I make sure the water is sitting out a bit so it is not icy cold but a more drinkable temp. I make sure I have a variety of massage products available for any situation, creams, oils, biofreeze and the rest. Then I sit and wait, I am ready early. This is a bad habit of mine. He calls and lets me know where he is and when he expects to arrive. Cool. I am ready. Now normally I would watch some porn during this time to get me “up” for the job so to speak, but I have already decided this is a non-sensual event so I check email and facebook repeatedly. Another call, he is here. I go down to the street to greet him and escort him up to my apartment. He is still dressed from work, not a look I have seen on him often. He looks good and is his normal jovial self. I try to keep things as professional as possible and ask him about his pains and offer him some water (I am nervous, why?). I excuse myself to wash my hands after telling him to undress to his level of comfort and lie on the table, explaining the draping option. As I am washing my hands, I suddenly realize I have not asked him if he needs to use the bathroom, basic etiquette rule one. I come running back into the room, he is in his underwear “I forgot to ask if you needed to use the bathroom, it was a long trip from work.” He does and I shake off the nerves and re-focus. When he returns, he drops his underwear and climbs on the table, tossing the draping towel aside. The quick glance I get of his cock is nice but nothing exceptional. If the rumors are true (ok, on-line photos) then he must be grower.
His ass is nice though. Unfortunately from what I read in his emails and blogs he does not like ass play (except rimming), but this is not that kind of massage. He has the soft rounded bubble but, unusual in someone of his size. It’s time to focus on the task at hand. I remind him that I will use a variety of pressures and to let me know if it ever too much. He laughs and says that it would be impossible; he has trained himself to withstand pain and likes a really deep massage. I go to work and it is true that he has extremely tense muscles, plenty of knots in the shoulders, strain between the shoulder blades and a tight lower back. We exchange some small talk and talk about the aches and pains and knots that I am finding. I spend a good 40 minutes just on his back, both of us being very professional the entire time. I finish with a few feather strokes and move down to his feet. I check to see how he is doing. “Great! You have magic hands!”
As I start working on his feet and legs he says “I half expected you to answer the door naked.” This takes me by surprise. Was he serious? Was he joking? It must be a joke. I respond with a lame line… “one should never assume.” I go back to work. I am coming to a point in the massage that I generally do the abductor rub under the leg through the groin, do I or don’t I? This is a very erotic area for most men, several have cum on my table from this move. On the other hand it is also a very therapeutic (if not exactly legal) and I have done it often on men while giving them therapeutic only massages, especially if they are comfortable with their bodies as I know my friend here is. What the hell! I’ll do it. I am careful not to touch his cock or balls but do reach his perineum. I repeat the stroke, maybe one or two more times than I need to. When I’m finished he makes a comment that no masseur has ever done that before, I explain that it is not exactly a legit move but very therapeutic. He liked it and saw no problem with it. I smile.
I do the other foot and leg, working silently. I repeat the abductor move and start to work on the glutes. I am reaching across him body to work on the far glute when he stretches his fingers up and finds the crotch of my shorts. He continues to feel around till he finds my balls and starts to tickle them, still through the fabric. Well, now I know he is interested in more than a therapeutic massage. I have told you before that I am an ass man, and my friend has a very nice one. It is not a hard muscle butt, but there is definitely some muscle under a soft layer fat that is giving the ass a sexy full look. I love working on an ass like this, one where two perfectly round globes meet in a beautiful cavern just waiting for exploration. I knead that glute hard, working in circles, reaching over occasionally to get my elbow into it. He is still tickling my balls and I have an aching erection. In a normal situation, I may have dropped my shorts here and let him play with my hard cock, but I remember that in his emails that he is not into anal at all and I still will need to climb onto the table to work out some more knots in his back and I don’t want to freak him out with a hard cock working into his ass crack, so I opt to keep clothed.  I switch sides of the table to work on the other glute, his hand again tickling my nuts through my shorts. My hard on is aching. I still try to continue to be as professionally as possible. I do some long full body light strokes after I have finished with his glute, I do a little stretching of his crack by working my thumbs down between those beautiful globes. I find his sphincter and add some lube to my thumb and gently rub back and forth on it. I keep it gentle and light, like a tongue gently caressing it, but not daring to enter. I climb onto the table still fully dressed work those back muscles over again and again. My crotch occasionally grazing his ass but trying not to let my hard dick slip between his cheeks, even fully clothed, I don’t want to scare him. I do massage those beautiful glutes some more and the dismount and do some full body feather strokes before I ask him to turn over.
His cock is definitely swollen, but it is not at full mast. It is definitely much bigger than when I first saw it. He is all smiles, I offer him some water and he takes a long drink. He lies back and closes his eyes, I strip down naked. I work on his chest, my dick occasionally bumping his head, he smiles more broadly. I move to the side of the table and work his abs, occasionally stoking across his pubes, his erection is becoming much fuller. It looks a bit like the Washington Monument, it is widest at the bottom and tapers up to the head. I don’t take the time to measure it, but I believe his claims of it being just shy of 9 inches. He has found my dick and is jacking it slowly in his hand. I move to the other side of the table and repeat the movements, he does as well with slowly jacking my cock. I start to go to town on his genitals, I stroke the length of his cock, I pull his nuts down and tickle them, I stroke a finger across his sphincter. He moans appreciatively at each stroke of his body, I reach up and tweak his nipples, I rub down across his abs, I stroke to the top of cock and down again, over the balls and perineum to the sphincter again and back. He is still rhythmically stroking my cock. I start using both my hands on his cock cupping one over the other so the head of his cock meets a more resistant barrier before bursting through to the air again.
I have over played my hand and he cums quite suddenly. He has a very full body orgasm, the kind I like his whole body convulsing for a few moments. He then lies back with his eyes closed and a big smile on his face. I say to him “what were you saying about magic hands?”
He lies there naked as I finish my work, no longer trying to touch me. I do the leg stretches, his cock slowly growing limp and starting to flop around as I move his legs around. I massage his legs ending with a groin stroke that goes up one leg, over his perineum and down the other leg and back again several times while I hold his nuts out of the way with my other hand. This is a great stroke, it causes the client to open his legs and stretch his groin while giving him very pleasurable sensations that are not directly connected with sex. I am all over the idea of treating the penis like any other appendage after the orgasm. It generally doesn’t need to be stroked any more but it likes to be handled and not ignored. I work his arms and stretch them over his head. They are not as tight as I would have expected, but then again, he is now much more relaxed than he was 90 minutes ago. We are going over the 90 minutes a bit, but I am more than ok with that. There was real work to be done and I think we have accomplished a lot. I am still nude, as is he. There is no shame and sex is not part of the equation anymore. He is drifting in a semi post coital state where his entire body has been relieved, not just his cock. My cock has deflated as well, the excitement is over, my mind has gone back to work and my body has followed. I work his neck and his shaved head (with a 5 o’clock shadow). I massage his face and ears. I then began the process of the connecting feather strokes over the entire body. He is still drifting somewhere, the smile still on his face. I perform the ending blessing by saying to myself “May god bless you and keep you. May god make his face to shine upon you, and be gracious onto you. May god lift up his countenance upon you, and give you peace” while connecting his 7 chakra points. He is an atheist but he doesn’t know I was thinking it, besides in my mind it is always god with the little g noting in my mind any deity available or just the universe herself.
I wash my hands and return, he is feeling well and I have him sit up and drink some water, we talk about some of the aches and pains and some stretches that he should do. He then brings up how much he owes me as he is getting dressed.  I say “let’s call it an hour.” He is agreeable and then starts taking out money, he tips $35. That’s fine. It’s too much but that’s fine. If that is what he wants to pay, I am ok with that. I just hope he realizes he doesn’t have to and is not expected to pay that much each time. All in all it was a very good session and I had a very good time and I hope he did as well. The lingering question is does this affect our friendship?
That question may never be properly answered. In order to change a friendship, the friendship would have had to have been well defined to begin with. It is not exactly like we have had sex, he received a service that he paid for. Perhaps sex would have made the friendship easier to define, perhaps not. From what I can tell, he is not the kind to judge another person unless they have treated others in an unkind way. I told my partner who my client was that night; he did not ask any further questions. I have seen my friend at the show a few times since and if anything, he seems a little more relaxed around me. Perhaps he was nervous about scheduling the massage as well. I hope that he comes back as a client. I hope that a friendship continues to grow. I appreciate his view of the world. I hope he appreciates mine. If he does come back, I may get naked earlier, if it’s OK with him. ;-)
-          Jack

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Recent Email from a Reader (Posted With Permission)


I love your blog.  I written positive comments and you’ve responded.  I think I told you about traveling to India last fall and getting 18 massages.
 
I absolutely love getting massages, and I always leave a good tip (25%).   Right now I’m seeing a guy once a week for 90 minute massages.  Sometimes he will spend as much as 10 to 30 minutes talking to me before the massage begins, depending on his schedule.  Usually very little talking during the massage, but some days are different.  Over time, several months now, he has been really opening up to me and vice versa so we are getting to know one another.  I like him.  We are both gay, he’s 42 and I am 59 (I’m an avid yoga practitioner so I’m trim and in pretty good shape).  Lately he’s been bringing up the topic of sex in a variety of ways—he’s told me he has good sex with his partner, he’s HIV positive, he once had an intense infatuation with a guy we both know, etc......last visit he told me that he usually got very aroused when he was receiving a massage, although not so much when giving one as that was work.  We never use any draping and honestly I’ve never gotten aroused with him.  I have no fear of that, but his massages are so deep and powerful that I go into the zone, really deep state, plus he doesn’t go for the erotic zones. 
 
I’m really beginning to get the impression that he’s telling me in a very round about way that if I want to get aroused during sessions that is okay.  BUT, for me to get aroused, I need the massage to be  slightly erotic, little brushes of the hand against erogenous zones.  Any feedback?  This guy is quite professional and has never said anything about sensual or erotic massage, but now that I’m a trusted, repeat client, and with his remarks about how he gets aroused when he is on the receiving end, make me wonder if he’s not opening up the door a bit.  Should I come right out and ask him if he does erotic massage?  I don’t want to do any “damage” to our relationship, which is very good, and up to now, not sexual.  I have lately been leaking pre-cum and I know that he doesn’t miss a thing, he’s keenly observant.
 
Thanks.  Keep blogging.

My Response:

Honestly, from what you have said, I agree with you. He is opening the door to something else. If you are comfortable talking with him, I would ask him verbally if he ever does erotic massage or if it something that he would consider. If he says no, you just "OK, I was just curious, love your work, keep doing what you've been doing." If he says yes, then the ball is in your court and you can decide whether or not you want one.

Gay male masseurs get asked this question often. For most, the stock answer they give is no. However, there are a great many who normally say no but for a long time attractive client will bend their rules. I suspect that this is the case here. If you have seen him that often and are have good talks, feel free to ask away.

- Jack

Friday, October 7, 2011

Apartment living

OK, I hate living in an apartment sometimes.
Working from your home is a benefit that most bodyworkers enjoy. It definitely has it's perks. No commute, saves money on renting a place of business (most massage salons take half of your money off the top), you can dress or undress as you please. ;-)
Now the ideal is owning your home, however most of us do not make that good of money to accomplish this so we rent. When working from your apartment the issues are numerous.
First, you have no control over the neighbors. In my building, the noise bleed from one apartment to the next isn't too bad but anything that happens in the hallway can be heard pretty clearly. So when the neighbors come tromping up and down the stairs, I hear it, as does my client. When they slam the doors (why do so many people slam their doors?) we hear it, when they continue their conversation or fight into the hallway, we hear it. If your neighbors decide to sit outside your building, drink beers and smoke cigarettes - there is little you can do to control it and it leaves a bad impression on your client which means you have to work that much harder.
Or there is the situation I am currently in. Maintenance. Our building is OK with letting you know when they are dropping by, but not great. Yesterday afternoon a sign went up on my door saying they were coming by today (Friday) to paint my bathroom. The paint in my bathroom has been peeling for sometime now and I have been bugging them to do something. I would have done it myself but we are not allowed. So the two appointments I had scheduled for today I had to call up and cancel, never good for business. Both are clients who have only seen me once before and it is not a good way to build a good client/therapist relationship. Now the issue with the bathroom is that the last time it was painted, they didn't prime it properly so the paint peeled. I wanted to be around to watch that it is done right this time. I figure if they show up early in the AM and prime, they can paint in the afternoon and be done. So I get up early and take everything out of my bathroom and even take the cabinet off the wall so that is all set for painting, and I wait. I figure that the earliest they would be here is 9AM. I start calling at 11AM. 2PM I am told they will be here shortly. At 3 they show up and say this is a bigger job and they will mud today and prime and paint on Monday. So they spend 15 minutes smearing mud over the walls and leave. I put back a few things to make the bathroom somewhat usable for the weekend but now I will loose Monday as a work day as well. If they could have told me approximately what time they were showing up today, I could have got at least one client in and because I will loose Monday, that is potentially another 2 clients I won't get.
Of course it is still not as bad as the time as the guy next door had a clog in his sink. they had a plumber come over and use a snake on his kitchen drain. What occurred to no one was that his kitchen sink and mine share a drain. So I am naked worked on a client doing some sensual work when I start hearing noises coming from my kitchen. It sounds like someone is banging on the sink. Then I hear what sounds like dishes breaking. Then all is peaceful for a while and the noise starts again. This pattern repeats for about 10 minutes until I excuse myself to check what is happening. The pipe snake had come up through my sink and found a dishtowel which was now wrapped around the end so it could not go back down in the sink. It had also knocked a few of my dishes out of the dish strainer (that's what I get for not emptying it right away). The snake was still flopping around with the towel on it and I was standing there naked watching it. I grab it and pull to let the owner on the other side I got it. He pulled back but not too far. I unwrap the towel and push on the snake to let them know I was done. They pull back on the snake and try to twist it back through. I walk back naked to  the table and briefly explain to my client what was happening and offer him a discount for the interruption. We laugh about it and then he looks at me seriously, "they won't be coming over here will they?" I assure him that it is unlikely, but should they ask to be admitted, I will give him his clothes and towel and send him into the bedroom so he can dress in private. There would of course be no charge for the work done up to that point.
So these are some of the hazards of doing massage work in your apartment. Definitely think about these things before you go into business for yourself! Have fun! - Jack

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Why don't erotic masseurs and escorts want to kiss?

Not only do most men who work in with erotic energy consider kissing to be one of the most personal experiences that many choose to only share with their significant other, they know it is also the easiest way to get sick. And I don't just mean a cold, flu, or strep throat:

Love is in the air
Germs are everywhere
Kissers beware
Of infections you can share.
We know that kisses of passion can lead to one thing or another. But did you know that kissing can also lead to an infectious disease? Mononucleosis, or mono, is the prototypical “kissing disease,” and sexually-transmitted diseases are infamous following some romantic interludes. But did you know that there are many infections that can be spread through mere kissing alone?
Infectious Diseases in Saliva
Infectious diseases are spread through several routes of transmission. “Oral transmission” refers to spreading of microbes through saliva, foods or drinks. When a person accidentally consumes microbe-contaminated items, such as saliva during kissing, the swallowing action of the tongue wipes the microbes against the back of the throat, allowing the microbe to enter the body. Infections, such as mononucleosis (the kissing disease), caused by Epstein-Barr virus (EBV), and cytomegalovirus (CMV) are spread via oral transmission from virus-containing saliva.
Other infectious microbes that spread through saliva do so by sticking to the inner surface of the cheeks and mouth, the tongue, or teeth. An example is the bacterium Streptococcus, which can cause an array of infections, including gum disease and strep throat.
An important thing to keep in mind is that the surfaces of the respiratory tract (nose, mouth, and throat) are continuous and made up of similar tissues. As a result, microbes that are found in the saliva can generally be found in other parts of the respiratory tract, including the nose and throat. Therefore, even colds and flus (and other respiratory infections) can potentially be spread through the saliva.
Infectious Diseases from Mouth Sores
Cold sores
Cold sores are caused by Herpes Simplex Virus-1 (HSV-1). In contrast to infections spread through the saliva, HSV-1 is spread through open cold sores on the lips or near the mouth. Although the infection is contagious through all stages of a cold sore, the infection is most contagious when the sore is open and leaking fluid.
Hand, foot, and mouth disease
Hand, foot, and mouth disease, caused by Coxsackie virus, is another infectious disease that is spread through open sores in the mouth. This infection is common in kids, especially those in daycare or preschool settings. It spreads primarily via the fecal-oral route, a common problem among daycares, since changing of diapers goes on all day.
But canker sores are not infectious.
In contrast to cold sores and coxsackie virus blisters, canker sores have no infectious disease origin and cannot be spread through the saliva or kissing.
What about HIV and Hepatitis B Virus?
HIV and hepatitis B Virus (HBV) are blood-borne and sexually-transmitted infections that have been found in the saliva. Despite the presence of HIV in saliva, there have never been any reports of HIV transmission via this route. In contrast, transmission of hepatitis B virus through saliva has been well documented, as well as hepatitis A and C.
Natural Microbial Defense Mechanisms in the Mouth
Saliva has a natural cleansing role, provided by its flushing activity. Other antimicrobial defenses in the saliva include antibodies and other antimicrobial proteins (e.g., lysozyme), and normal mouth flora (the “good” bacteria that prevents growth of “bad” bacteria).
The spread of infectious microbes through the saliva can occur when natural resistance in the mouth is reduced. For example, gum infections can occur in people with vitamin C deficiencies, and thrush, caused by Candida yeast infections, is more likely to occur in people who have been taking antibiotics. People who are dehydrated have reduced salivary flow and four times more bacteria in their mouths.
Preventing Kissing Diseases
Be careful who you kiss.
Source:
Mims CA, Playfair JH, Roitt, IM, Wakelin D, Williams R, and Anderson RM. Medical Microbiology. ©1993. Mosby-Year Book Europe Limited. London, UK.

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Today Sexy Guy

So today was one of those rare days when the client is so much more beautiful than I and yet seems to find me very sexy.
"John" contacted me through a gay massage site and set up a time for a massage. There was not a lot of chatting but I was able to see his profile. There was no photo and it had not been updated in a few years but it appeared that his age was 30 and his description was "fit and trim."
He showed up on time and I was surprised to see a very fit and trim black man about age 30. He seemed pleased to see me and hurried in. I asked the usual questions about aches and pains and as he tells me about his different little aches and his recent activities in sports and his new job as a waiter while he was starting to undress. I must say for a moment I was amazed. His body was amazing. He was muscular and compact, his waist was tiny, his torso a V, his ass was the most amazing bubble butt that I had ever seen and that's saying a lot. His legs were powerful and his cock was huge, his nuts were large and shaved. In general his genitals were far too large for his body. He stood at maybe 5'7" and his waist could not have been more than 26" yet soft his cock was over 6" and fat to boot with balls the size of two large eggs. His butt was also far too large for his light though muscular frame sticking straight out behind him these large full melons defying gravity. He was not at 0 body fat, which made him even more attractive for as the muscles were sitting there in plain view he did not have that "oh for god's sake eat something" look about him, the little fat he had softening the edges and making him approachable.
I told him to climb on the table while I went to wash my hands. I also needed to adjust the erection in my shorts. I told him there was a towel to cover himself if he chose but when I returned he had tossed it aside. He was lying on his stomach as was instructed and one of my favorite sights was in front of me: the curves of a muscular man lying on a flat plane made all the more sensual with the contrast of his dark skin against the cream color of the sheets on the table.
Now there had been no discussion of any erotic or sensual work and generally speaking, most of my younger good looking clients are not really looking for anything more than a good thorough massage, maybe a happy ending with their eyes closed, thinking of someone else perhaps. Even in this state, with the client nude and undraped with legs slightly parted there is still no sure bet of sensual work. His penis was not visible between his legs and I adjusted myself once more and took a deep breath and started my job.
As per usual I start working on John's back, amazed again at the V shape of his torso and tiny waist. His muscle are tight and I give him a deep tissue massage. I check with him often to make sure the pressure is OK. He makes no inappropriate move towards me and I give him a couple of chances. When I work his shoulders with his arm draped over my leg, his forearm milometers from my hard cock, his hand draped on my calf - no advances were made. I work my way to his lower back and hips. Letting my hands graze over those luminous globes of ass.  I work his back hard for 30 full minutes full minutes before I do a light touch over it with just my finger tips. I then massage his scalp and run a finger down his spine to the top of the crack of his ass and back. I check with him to be sure all OK. He says he's doing great. I move to his feet and he sticks a hand beneath his body, raises his hips and shoves his huge erection down between his legs. I am not a size queen but I can be impressed. If his genitals looked too large before, now with a full erection it borderlines on absurd. It is a strong thick uncircumcised cock, the kind with the thick veins showing all over because it is trying to grow even larger. So at least I know I have him aroused. ;-)
I work on his foot and leg trying hard to focus on the task at hand. His calf muscles are well developed and tight. I make sure that he gets the best massage possible and work his tight muscles. I work my way up his leg to the base of his ass. His legs part slightly more and I work the inside of his thighs, it is impossible not to graze his dick since it is filling the space between his legs completely. I bring his foot up and pull his knee outwards and lay the leg back down to open up his groin to massage the adductor muscles. I lean over his ass and run my hands under his leg through his groin, hitting his hard dick and large balls with each stroke, my nose right over the cavern between the mountainous globes of his ass. I lengthen the stroke so that my finger can rub his taint and eventually the rosebud of his ass.  His hand is now right at my crotch and starts to rub it slightly. I repeat the actions far longer than is needed but eventually stop and return his leg to a normal position and check to see how he is doing. "Great" he answers. I then mention that I forgot to ask if he was interested in my being nude - an offer I make to members of the website where he found me. "Yes, that would be nice." I undress and with a smile, repeat the actions on the other leg.
I reach the portion of the massage where I get to focus on that giant Bubble Butt. I truly wish I had taken a picture of it for you. With his small waist and low percentage of body fat his ass stood tall and proud above every other part of his body as he lay on stomach. I started working on the cheek opposite from the side of the table from where I am standing so I am bending over his body and my erection is poking his hip, his hand finds it and wraps around it. I massage his glute deep and hard using both hands like kneading dough and then working across the fibrous muscles with my elbow. I then dig into the crevasse of  his ass stroke from the center out, lightly stroking the rose bud as I do. Then stroke from the top of his crack down over the rosebud, taint, balls to the end of that long thick cock and work my way back. I repeat this action again and again while he strokes my cock. I smile and switch sides of the table and repeat.
I now do a few strokes from shoulders to toes and back, again casually grazing his ass crack. I apply a bit more cream to his rosebud and slowly massage it, his giant cock is twitching and leaking. I lean down to his ear and ask if he would like a prostate massage. "I have never had one but would be willing to try it."
I add a bit more lube and work a single finger into his ass, working between those meaty globes. I go slowly and find his prostate and slowly start rubbing it, his cock is throbbing and leaking copious amounts of pre-cum. After a few moments I withdraw and add a little more lube and a second finger. I again work the fingers slowly in and massage the prostate, I also start working the fingers in circles to widen his sphincter. I check to be sure that his cock is still hard and give it a stroke or two with my free hand, it is like a rock and still oozing. I remove my two fingers and apply still more lube and slowly work three fingers in. I go slowly, stopping occasionally to allow him to adjust to the size. While waiting for him to adjust he suddenly shove his ass up onto my fingers, I follow his ass as it goes down and continue to shove forward until my fingers are completely buried in his ass. I again hold for a few moments then start massaging his prostate and then start fucking him with my hand. I again do this probably longer than needed but it is great fun. I take my hand out and clean it and ask him if he was alright. "That was amazing!" he responds.
"I am going to climb onto the table and work on your back, I promise not to do anything unsafe while I am up there."
"Alright"
I climb onto the table between his legs and start doing long strokes from his feet to his shoulders, my dick sliding up and over his ass cheeks as I go. Work his lower back and then start with my forearms on his ass checks and slide them up to between his shoulder blades. This angle causes my cock slide over his balls and stick deep in the crevasse of his ass. I am careful not to apply to much pressure on his ass so as not to freak him out but keep the dick there for a few moments. I bring my body back and stroke forward again over his back  with my fore arms again and like before, keep my dick knocking at the gates but with no pressure at all. I do not want to fuck him (alright, I do, but I won't) but I want him to think that I might. I again bring my body back and stretch forward again this time lying my body on top his with my dick lying between his ass cheeks with the head at the top of his ass crack. My hands reach down and grasp his hands and I hump his ass ever so slightly, his rises to greet my dick. I stiffen my body against his and squeezes his ass against my dick. I rise up and give some light full body strokes before I lay atop of him again and repeat the previous moves. I climb off and towel him down and do full body feather strokes and ask him to turn over.
I offer him a drink of water and he reclines on his back when he is through. Those melons that stuck up so proudly before are now forcing his crotch high into the air, his long uncut cock has a natural upward curve that I had not noticed before and the head of it alone is touching his abs well above his belly button. I start work on his chest and his head is straining to feel my own hardon as I stand at the head of the table. He finds my erection with his right ear and smiles as he leans his head into it, snuggling with it. His cock jump a bit each time I tease one of his nipples - I make a mental note of that.
I work my way down to his abs, doing circles over his belly and my hands knocking his stiff cock as I rub further down into his pubes with each circumference. I do a stroke up his cock, following the natural curve and amazed at it's length and girth. I follow the curve down again and over his balls down to his rosebud then back up, cupping his large balls and puling them tight, tickling them with the finger tips of my other hand. He is still oozing pre-cum but I want a bit more lube so I add a bit and some again at his hole so I continue to play there. I should make this last but I am hot and just want to jerk him till he cums. His hand is on my cock and he is gently jerking me. I take his cock with both hands and start sliding them both up and down, one following the other, the lower hand sliding pass his ball and stroking his hole before coming up. He releases my cock and puts his hand behind my back, reaching as far as he can as if he is trying to get his arm around me. I step towards the head of the table and his hand keeps reaching around my back, I take another step towards his head while still pumping his dick with both hands. He now can get his hand around hips and pulls me towards his head, I allow myself to be pulled but continue to pump his dick. he sits up a bit then leans over and engulfs my dick in his mouth. This beautiful specimen of young manhood wants nothing more than to suck the hell out of my dick and suck the hell out of it he does. My rule is I don't cum with my clients and my mind is racing a mile minute trying to get my mind off of the grade A blow job I am getting, he is sucking with such gusto and determination, his hands wandering around my ass and up to my nips. I reach with my right hand and get a finger up his ass again and long stroke his cock with my left. I am hoping he will cum before I can no longer hold out but my hips are doing there own thing now and I am pumping his mouth and he is loving it. I take the finger out of his ass and use it to cup the head of his dick and I stroke the length with my other hand, his hips are pumping as well, I know it won't be much longer. His cock is so hard and I feel each vein as it slides through my hand, his mouth is velvety warm around my cock.
In a last ditch effort I take my hand off his cock head and press down hard on his pubic bone, this applies pressure to the bladder and sends him over the edge. A fountain of thick milky white cum shoots from his cock covering his chest and abs. His body heaves with enthusiasm of his orgasm and his ass muscles tense and contract thrusting his groin into the air over and over. He doesn't let go of cock, he keeps sucking on it like there is no tomorrow, like it is the last cock on earth and if he were to let go there would be no other chances. I am perilously close to cumming I try to with draw and his hand claw at my hips. His orgasm subsides and I take his hands in mine and remove them from my hips and withdraw my cock. Orgasm averted. I take a towel and wipe him down. I finish the massage with stretches and long feathery strokes, he reaches for and holds onto my cock when ever it it near.
When it is over and he is draped in a towel, I ask him how he feels. "Amazing, that was a great massage, exactly what I was looking for." He gets up and dresses, his cock now soft is still too long for his body and his balls too large and his ass full and proud. He takes my business card and a few extra. "That was great, I am definitely going to recommend you to my friends and I will be back again for sure." He tips me well and I thank him. I smile as I watch him leave and think about being able to do it all again. ;-)

DADT is dead


DADT is done. Just a quick note to say how thrilled I am about this. Now remember that when Don't Ask Don't Tell was signed into law, it was actually a step forward. Instead of an all out ban on homosexuals in the military, the law was meant to say it's none of our business, but please keep it under wraps. Huge step forward at the time.
Unfortunately it ended up discharging even more men and women than before the ban. Not to mention it was incredibly hard for men and women to serve silently.
But now it is all over and there is much to celebrate. This is a big step forward, though we are still far behind many other countries and gay men and women still suffer a number inequalities under the law in the US. Any thoughts on how long until Federal Recognition of same sex marriage?

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Catching up. Not a sexy post. ;-)

First off another apology for not posting in forever. Life, y'know? I have been doing more acting which eats up a lot of my time, I should be writing a short play right now, but I needed to talk to y'all first. Still doing bodywork during the days. Partner is doing fine. He has been in the process of switching careers, a very long slow process, but I am sure that he will be much happier, if not richer. Money is not everything, but it is important in this particular reality.
Overall happiness has abounded considering it has been a rough year so far. One car accident that wasn't our fault and not terrible but upped the insurance to an almost impossible rate. Partner was laid off from his job about 3 months before he planned to quit. His new business is getting off the ground slowly. Next month rent may be an issue for the first time in an amazingly long time, or it won't be. Dealing with ailing parents on my side. So far I have not had to make an emergency trip home, but it won't surprise me too much if I do. We had booked and laid down deposits on a trip to the UK and to the beach before my partner was laid off. Though money was tight we went anyway and had a really nice time in  the UK. Beach was OK. I need to find a new summer get away.
Partner needed new hearing aids, wow, that was expensive... $4000.00 and insurance did not cover a penny of it. Now why would insurance cover birth control and Viagra but not hearing aids? Strange world, but you just have to smile.
I have decided to live life with out a TV. It actually blew up (it was 16 years old) and I probably could afford to replace it, but I realized that it was just not necessary. I was wasting to much time in front of it anyway, and I am re-discovering radio and my amazing CD collection.
Business has been better this year than last, which is good. I do wish the news would stop harping about the economy. Every time there is a major headline about the economy being bad, business drops off for at least a week. However, as I said earlier, bringing in more than last year so that is good!
The acting has been great fun and I had forgotten how much I missed it. It is a lot of hard work but the more you do the easier it is. Gotten a number of good reviews and nominated for a couple of local awards, nice to be recognized.
Spend a lot of time watching old movies at one of our local cinemas and through Netflix on our computer. Keeping cool this terribly hot summer. Other than one or two exceptions, there has not been a lot that I have wanted to see this summer in new movies.
Our time in the UK was made magical by meeting up with  long lost friends who were wonderful hosts, one couple in Wales and another in Ireland. They took time out of their busy schedules to take us to their favorite spots and arranged affordable or even free housing for us including a night in an authentic Irish castle.
The trip to the Beach was a little less spectacular. If you are a regular reader of this blog, then you know I wrote about a gay men's clothing optional bed and breakfast that we have stayed at. Well, after a good many years of making one or two pilgrimages a year there, I think we have had enough. The rates continue to rise each year and the thrill has definitely worn off. Our favorite parts of the trip were not the hot men or the lying out naked but the free concerts at the beach and the nice new little spots to eat. Perhaps next year we need to try nude camping instead. ;-)
Well, that is about it in a nutshell, I am growing a beard for my next role and it is coming in very white - fine for the role but a bit of shock to some of my clients... others love it. Though I do not go to bars frequently, I will say the white beard attracts it own very unique set of young men. I was a bit shocked to be referred to as a "daddy" but I can see the advantages... though honestly, always been attracted to men close to my own age.
Alright, I promise to write again soon about something that you will actually be interested in. Thanks for listening. - Jack

Monday, March 28, 2011

Other cultures…


We are the sum of our experiences.
While I was brought up in a rural neighborhood by very Christian parents, I was also fortunate enough to experience a lot of little life lessons about how no one is perfect and perhaps we all need stop judging and stop trying to pretend that we are any better than we are. For example, while my parents were bringing me up in a very religious life, I also knew that my mother was married twice and I had 4 half brothers, no big deal right? In a very rural and religious part of the country divorce was still looked down upon and it wracked my mother with guilt. Little did I know how the story continues. When I was 16, the only one of the 5 boys still at home, my parents put some photos of when they were younger on display. Well, imagine my surprise when I saw the photo of my father as a young boy looks exactly like a photo of my closest half-brother. When I confronted my mother, she says “Well, I guess there is something we should tell you. He is your full brother, your father and I were having an affair when I was still married to my first husband.” See, even my saintly parents were not perfect and had sex, a lot. While this traumatized me shortly, I soon had my own problems with realizing I was gay, which, when I told my parents they had all the usual responses: It’s a phase, you will go to hell, we will put you through therapy, it’s our fault for not raising you right, it’s god’s punishment for our sins (which is when I learned that mother had to get married the first time because she was pregnant). They did not kick me out of the house; I was in college and didn’t live there any more anyway. My father did say that he loved me but we would never speak of it again. My mother would ask me questions whenever my father was not around. Eventually, as the years passed, my father came around and even they even changed churches to a more liberal one accepting of gay people. If I had been born a decade earlier, I may have gotten married and had children and not come out till later in life and been looking for an understanding gay massage therapist.
Likewise each of my clients are coming to my table with their own unique background. Recently a black man in his early thirties came to me for an erotic massage. He also was raised a Christian and was taught that homosexuality is wrong. He has never told anyone about his feelings for men. He has managed not to get married by telling everyone that he is “playing the field.” He dates women, but never for very long. Many in his life most likely suspect, but have not yet pressured him to “repent” and marry. His experience with men is extremely limited, since he worries that someone will see him with a known gay man. He won’t answer a personal ad, he won’t go to a sex club, he won’t go to an adult bookstore, he won’t go to a gay bar so the few experiences he has had have been mainly when he travels out of town on vacation by himself or for business. His knowledge about safe sex I find was sadly lacking. So he was thrilled to find me, though he drove a good distance to get to me and even then parked around the corner, just in case someone he knows might know what work I do and see his car out front. He was able to let me know that he wanted a sensual massage and wanted to see me naked. I took pity on him and stripped. ;-)
Likewise I recently had an Israeli client who doesn’t want anyone to know that he is gay, for many of the same reasons (slightly different religion). He is an extremely attractive man who trims his body hair all over. He is extremely fit and trim with well defined abs. Normally a man like this should be doing porn, not paying me to give him an erotic massage (although I have massage porn stars before, everyone needs some relaxation). Anyway, because he does not get many chances to be with men, he prefers to pay for his experiences. He avoids bath houses and gay bars since he is worried someone he knows may see him entering or leaving such places. He worries about what might happen if he met a stranger on line, it may be a trap or he may get robbed or worse. So he keeps an eye out for ads for massage by men that have been up for a long time and have good reviews. That is how he found me.
Our session begins as normal with him stripping down and lying naked face down on the table. He asks me if I will strip down as well. I do. I massage his back and legs, he is tense but is relaxing and sinking into the table. He occasionally strokes my cock if it near his hand but is not frantic about it. As I stroke his inner thighs, he sighs contently. I reach through his crotch, under his leg and feel his hard penis. He moans lightly. I massage his buttocks and he grinds slightly into the table. I stroke lightly outside his anus and his perineum, he raises his hip slightly inviting me further. I slowly slide a lubed finger into his ass and massage his prostate. He undulates, trying to get me further into his ass. I slip in a second finger and stroke in and out slowly. He moans lightly. I clean my hands and climb upon the table. I stroke his body from feet to shoulders paying particular attention to his glutes. I lay upon his back with my hard cock nestled between his firm butt cheeks, I grab his hands in mine and squeeze while I stiffen my body giving him my full weight. I climb off and do a light finger stroke over his entire back side and wipe him down with a towel.
I tell him it is time to turn over, I offer him a drink which he takes eagerly while I re-arrange the towels and bolsters. I tell him to lie down on his back and I go to work on his well defined chest cover with shortly trimmed dark hair. I tease his nipple and watch his uncut hard penis twitch. He is hung average, not too large or small and of decent width. I move down to rub his hard abs, his cock doing a frantic dance, begging for attention. I stroke it occasionally to let it know that it has not been forgotten. I switch sides and repeat the ab work. Just as I start stroking his cock with gusto, he asks if we can change positions so he can massage me. I have done this with clients in the past, usually only after they have been regulars for some time, but he has really good energy and I am genuinely aroused. I say sure and switch places with him, lying on my back, showing him where the creams and towels are if he needs anything. He very lovingly strokes my entire body from head to toe. He has a gentle and curious touch, almost as if a blind man is exploring my body for the first time. When he starts to focus on my genitals, he experiments with different strokes on my cock and balls. He then moves down to give me an external anal massage. Through it all he asks for feed back and I give him as much as I can, telling him to experiment and letting him know what feels good. I allow him to play for maybe 15 minutes total before I tell him it is time to switch back. His cock is still very hard and dripping cum.
I massage his legs a bit then go to town on his cock, balls and ass. His hand has a firm grip on my cock stroking it quickly. I know he is close but I tease him, letting him rest between strokes and teasing his nipples. When I feel he has had enough, I focus on his cock while looking into his eyes and encourage him to cum, “yeah man, that’s it, oh fuck yeah, do it now!” He cums, shooting all over his chest, yelling and grunting as he does. I clean him up and continue the massage with the stretches for his legs and arms. I finish with the blessing and ask him how he is doing. He is nothing but smiles and says he loved the massage. He asks me if he could make me cum, I reply that I prefer to share that with my partner (though honestly I was thinking about how much I wanted to fuck that tight hairy ass of his). He understands and we share a naked hug. I hope I get to see him again.
Anyway, the list will go on. I have clients who are Indians, American Indians, Hispanics etc, each with it’s own set of hang ups on sex, particularly gay sex. Many get married like they are expected to, the younger ones put it off if they can. Many have moved far from their families but even then feel that there are others in their current society who will be more judgmental than they can handle. Many clients have their own personal baggage from personal experience that were either pleasant or not. Some open up and tell me as much as they can while others will tell me nothing at all, in which case, I just have to listen to their bodies and my intuition and hope for the best.
Again as I have said before, to think that there is no place in our society for workers like me is only because you do not know what is out there.

Saturday, February 26, 2011

The most aggravating client.

OK, how to annoy your masseur? By not taking no for an answer, ever.

Actual texts from a client:

Client: morning

Me: morning

Client: Can I ask you a question?

Me: Sure

Client: Will you top me?

Me: No, sorry.

Client: Why not?

Me: I don’t do that with clients.

Client: Do you ever top?

Me: Yes, I am a top, but only with my partner.

Client: So, will you top me?

Me: No.

Client: Can I still get a massage?

Me: Yes, and I hate texting.

He schedules an appointment, he is a repeat client. We will call him Hank. He is a married man in his 30’s, muscular but also a bit over weight, bald, and a successful business owner. When he is on the table, he is a perfect gentleman. As per arranged, I do give him the usual manual release, but I stay dressed. The most he does in reciprocation is to occasionally stroke my leg. He takes an hour massage and tips exceedingly well. No mention is made of sex or the texts, all he talks about is his business and his father.

One week later, it starts again.

Hank: morning

Me: morning

Hank: Can I ask you a question

Me: Sure

Hank: Will you top me?

Me: no

Hank: Why not?

Me: I don’t do that with clients.

Hank: Why not?

Me: I don’t. I think you need a hooker, they are expensive.

Hank: Do you know any?

Me: No. Why do want to be topped?

Hank: I have a buddy who lets me suck him off, he wants to top me.

Me: So let him.

Hank: He has a huge penis, it scares me. Looking for a smaller one to break me in. I’ve never been topped.

(not sure how I should feel about this….)

Me: Ok, I can give you a prostate massage and gently work your anus open so you can take a penis.

Hank: So you won’t top me?

Me: No

Hank: Can I still get a massage?

Me: Yes

And we schedule another session. He only wants an hour, so I give him quick massage to relax him before I start work his ass while he is still lying on his stomach. I start with lots of lube and one finger. He likes the sensation as I work the finger back and forth and rub his prostate. I add another finger and my other hand I stroke his back and legs. He is very tight so we spend a long time with the just the two fingers. He undulates his hips more so I reach under to find his penis (average sized) and it is partially erect. I stroke it and he starts to moan. I withdraw my fingers from his ass and add more lube, I stop stroking his penis as I start to work three fingers into his ass. He tenses and I stop, my knuckles are still outside his ass, if this is going to work, he will need to relax so I just wait. Eventually his sphincter starts to relax and he pushes back onto my fingers, I work them in circles as I gently push forward. My knuckles slip through and all three fingers are into as far as the will go, I pause again to let him adjust to the new feelings. His penis had lost a bit of firmness, so I play gently with the head and it regains its full firmness. I start a rhythmic pumping of my fingers in and out of his hole as I stroke his cock, then his legs, then his back and then back to his cock.

I remove my fingers and tell him to get on all fours. I add lube to my fingers and again insert three, this time with very little hesitation. I add lube to his cock and start milking him while I thrust my fingers in and out of his hole. I remove all three finger and add my pinky as I go back in, he grunts but he takes it. I work his hole around and back and forth, paying close attention to his prostate while I continue to milk his cock, he moans loudly and shoots all over the sheet on the massage table. I stop the thrusting and keep my fingers in as far as they will go in his ass while he shoots.

When he is finished, I withdraw and get a cum towel and start cleaning up my hand and his cock and wiping as much cum as I can off the sheet. I lay a fresh towel on the sheet and tell him to lie on his back. I use the few remaining moment to give the front side of his body a rub down. Other than some moans and groans, he has been silent about the activities, he had talked a bit about his business and his father at the beginning of the session but has not talked in words for some time. “How are you doing Frank?”

“Fine. Good. Thanks.”

“Are you OK with the ass play?”

“Yeah, that was good.”

“OK” I say. “You took 4 fingers which means with a little patience you should be able to take just about any cock. Just let him know to go slow, prep yourself with some finger play and you should be fine. About the only difference is that I stopped when you came, a lot of tops won’t. They want to get off in your ass and will keep going until they do. Also, make sure that he wears a condom and you use plenty of lube. No negotiation on that. Got it?

“Yeah. Thanks.”

A little more chit chat about his work and he leaves, giving me another generous tip.

A week later, the same texts except he now wants to be “topped roughly.” I say no repeatedly and he books a regular massage. He shows up an hour late. Not cool. He apologizes and says he’ll leave if I can’t take him now (I can and frankly I need the money).

So, as we get started I ask him how being topped by his friend went. “We didn’t do it, I chickened out.”

“Sorry to hear that.”

“I am just afraid it will hurt.”

“Did it hurt when I fingered you?”

“No, it was uncomfortable a couple of times.”

“Did you enjoy it?” I ask.

“Yeah.”

“You still want to be fucked though, you asked me again today.”

“Yeah.”

“But not by your friend?”

“Not ready.”

“OK” I say. “You want to be fucked roughly by me so you are ready for him?”

“Yeah, will you?

“No. But I will work your ass pretty damn hard with my fingers again.”

“OK”

So we set off on a similar routine as before, but I go up to four fingers much faster and really shove them in and out hard. I pump his cock as before until he cums but I continue to shove my fingers in and out of his hole until leaps forward off my fingers.

“Are you OK?” I ask.

“Yeah.”

“A bit different feeling after you are done cumming isn’t it?”

“yeah.”

“Sure your OK?”

“yeah.”

I finish the massage in silence and after we are done I tell him that odds are that is what your top might do. “If he does and it is too much, then you just leap off of him like you did with me. The best position for a first timer is generally with both of you lying on your sides with the top behind you. The other option for a first timer is for you to squat over his dick while he is lying on his back, this puts you in control. Doggy style is fine on a bed, but don’t let him pin you up against a wall or a table, you will then have no control whatsoever.”

“Ok”

That was all about a month ago. He still has not let the guy top him. He still texts me every week. I still really hate texting. He still wants me to “top him roughly.” I still say no, he still gets a massage and finger the hell out of his ass and he tips me well. He still wants appointments at the last second and has shown up late and done a no show, all cardinal sins. When he does show, he is generally well behaved and tips well, so that is how he is still my client.

If I knew of a good gay sex therapist or surrogate, I would recommend that he see one. How frustrating it must be for him to know what he wants but be so afraid of it at the same time. I feel sympathy for his situation, I really do. I am just a sensual masseur and not wanting to be anything more in that line of business right now.