Things that I have learned

Wow, how time flies. Sorry that it has been a month since I posted. I have been working on a couple of ideas but have not liked the finished product.
However, I was writing up a list of things I have learned in life for a couple of graduations and thought I would share them here:

1. When I was a teen, my mother always said to me as I was leaving the house, “Keep your chin up, your mouth shut and your nose clean. And remember you’re a gentleman.” I took these words to mean:

• Keep your chin up – Have pride in yourself.
• Your mouth shut – Never speak with out thinking about what you are going to say and what the repercussions of your words may be.
• Your nose clean – Stay away from trouble.
• And remember you’re a gentleman – Good manners will always pay off.

2. Consequences – When faced with any decision, no matter how big or small, stop and think what the worst thing that could happen is and then decide if it is worthwhile doing.

3. The truth is always the best bet. Lying always makes things worse, and odds are you will get caught.

4. People will lie to you especially if they want something, I know that is hard to believe, but it’s true.

5. Beware of eloquent speakers; they often have something to hide.

6. If you want to know what kind of person someone is, watch how they treat their waiter.

7. You cannot choose your family, but they will always be there for you, unless you ignore them.

8. Friends are the family you can choose. Lots of people will say they are your friends, but real friends will help you move your furniture. To have good friends, you must be a good friend.

9. Relationships (romantic or otherwise) must be tended to; they are wonderful and rewarding but must be nurtured everyday. Ignore them and they will go away.

10. Every time you are in an argument, stop and try to see things from the other side, they may know something that you don’t.

11. Speaking quietly will force others to listen to you more closely.

12. Learn to be independent and to enjoy your own company. Once you like yourself and know who you are, you will have something worthwhile to share with others.

13. Don’t expect someone else to throw you a party, life is short, throw your own party.

14. To become really good at anything takes a lot of practice; anyone who says different, is lying.

15. If you believe that there is something that you cannot do, you have just made it so.

16. You accomplish in proportion to what you attempt; the more you attempt, the more you will accomplish.

17. If you can figure out how to make a living at something you like to do, you will never have to work a day in your life.

18. If you are doing a job just for the money, you will never feel you are being paid enough.

19. You are not going to win the lottery, so play it if you like, but know it is just in good fun.

20. Money does not buy you happiness, but it can get you out of a trouble.

21. Credit cards are evil and the high interest rates should be outlawed.

22. If you want to know the real problem with the world, follow the money trail.

23. Selflessly help others whenever possible. If karma does exist, you want it working for you, not against you.

24. If you are ever feeling bad about your life, volunteer your time to help those less fortunate, trust me, there are plenty of them out there.

25. Never say never, and be careful not to judge others. You just never know.

26. There are so many religions in the world and all are certain that they are the only true religion. They all have good and bad aspects, study as many as you can.

27. Television does have some interesting things to watch, but it is mainly a tool to keep you from living your life.

28. Read books. There are so many amazing stories.

29. Never stop learning, the more you learn, the more you realize how little you know and nobody likes a know it all. Age does not bring wisdom, living does.

30. Travel – the world is a huge and wondrous place filled with amazing people, don’t take my word for it, go out there and meet them. Seriously. Travel.

31. Never hate someone because you were told to.

32. Continue to exercise and eat well, you want to be able to enjoy the time you have on earth.

33. Life really is short. Time is relative, the longer you live the shorter each day is and the faster life will go by. That being said, as long as you are alive, it is never too late.

34. Never sit there a bitch, get off your butt and do something, then you have the right to bitch.

35. Stand up for what you believe in, if not you, then who? If not now, then when? But gather all the facts first and find out why others oppose your ideas.

36. Sometimes, bad things just happen for no reason. The true test of an adult is how they deal with them.

37. According to the Dali Lama, the purpose of life is to be happy. This is a choice.

38. There will always be times in your life that it feels like you are starting over from scratch. It’s OK, everyone has to do it. Just learn from your mistakes and forgive yourself.

39. Sometimes your elders do know more than you, sometimes they don’t. Listen to their advice; it comes from years of making mistakes.

40. Never throw something away that can be used by someone else. Find them and give it to them freely.

41. Share what you have learned with others, they may not listen, but at least you tried. Give a man a fish and he eats for a day, teach a man to fish and he will never go hungry.

42. Never follow the crowd with out deciding for yourself if that is the direction that you want to go in.

43. No one knows for certain what happens when you die, so make the most out of this life.

44. I have always liked the following:
Do not ask to have your life’s load lightened, but for the courage to endure. Do not ask for perfection in all you do, but for the wisdom not to repeat mistakes. Do not ask for fulfillment in all your life, but for the patience to accept frustration. Do not ask for more before saying thank-you for what you have already received. (by Brenda Short)

45. There are a lot of lonely people in the world just wanting to share their lives with someone.

46. Everyone has some sort of body issue.

47. The happiest people I know are nudists.

48. Everyone is a little bisexual.

49. You always want to be the second prettiest person in the bath house. Very few people will approach the prettiest thinking that they don't have a chance and no matter who they hook up with, they may feel they are tricking down.

50. Older or less attractive people can be really great at sex, conversely, really attractive people can be terrible at sex.

51. Everyone is somebody's type, it is just difficult to find the right match sometimes.

52. Midgets are proportional, dwarfs are not.

53. Penises come in all shapes and sizes but are all still pretty much the same and do the same things.

54. You can get an estimate to the size of a penis based on certain body parts (the first three fingers on the hand or relative size to the foot) but there are plenty of exceptions.

55. Write your own memoirs. If they seem boring, then you need to get to work.