Sorry for the delay. I have a lot on my mind again and bit of an issue trying to put it all in to words.
I want to write a much longer post soon, but I think it will help if I get this off my chest first.
For anyone considering a profession similar to mine, I must remind you that it has it's pitfalls. A couple of weeks ago, I had a very unpleasant encounter. I have been very fortunate since these are very few and far between, but I do believe that it should still be discussed.
The encounter was with a client who had seen me once before, almost a full year before, I keep good enough records that I can usually look something like that up. It was a sensual massage, not much different than a lot that I do. The client was a big guy in his late 30's early 40's. When it was over, he compliments my work, gets dressed and says "I'll pay you next time." Money being as tight as it is, and the fact that the last time I saw this guy was a year ago, I protest.
I explain that I don't do business that way and if he needs to get some cash, I will happily walk across the street with him while he gets some out of the ATM. He starts on about how I can trust him, and I push on with I just don't do business like that. He then takes out a wad of money, peels off a $20 bill, tossing it on the table and says "here, how's that?"
I remind him of what the cost is and he claims he has never paid that much. I explain that I have not increased my rates since the last time he saw me and with tip, he paid me more than that last time.
He then gets angry. He starts to leave and I stand before the door blocking his path, I want my money. He threatens me with violence. Now, I have to decide if he is serious and what is worth it. I inform him he still owes me money and if ever wants to see me again, he needs to pay. Now he starts in on how that's not fair, I argue what he is doing to me is not fair, he still refuses to pay and is getting more and more angry. I now say fine, go, but don't bother calling again, I will not take you as a client. He throws down another 20 and asks how about now? You are almost halfway there I reply. He curses and storms out. I block his number on my phone.
All in all I was lucky. He did not hit me, or worse. I got about half the money. I know the economy is bad and that can really drive people crazy. I don't think he was on drugs (though I may be wrong) and he wasn't drunk.
This can happen to any massage therapist, sensual work or not, who works on their own. I have been short changed before, but never threatened with violence, again, I have been lucky. It has made me long for the day when I went to a mindless job and collected a big fat check for little work. I never thought I would say that.
Most of my clients are wonderful people and most of the time I really enjoy my work, but with the economy being so bad..... this is not really worth it.
Here is hoping that December and the new year will bring me some better work and money. - Jack
4 comments:
Maybe its time you set up a rule that the first "x" number of times that you see a client (esp a new one and until they establish a track record with you) that you insist they pay up-front. A simple matter which many businesses legitimately do and which protects both you and the client. This is a "no fee", "no service provision" arrangement. The tip at the end is discretionary but at least you have an up-front fee to at least cover your time.
Sorry to hear about this.
Thanks Scotte, like I said, it doesn't happen often and in reality I lost only $35 plus tip. The worst part is the personal feeling of trust in your fellow man that gets lost.
As to why I don't ask for money up front? Well, you are right, I probably should, at least in with newer clients. Unfortunately, it is one of the biggest complaints I heard when I did a survey of what people didn't like about the masseurs that they have tried.
The good news if we went by percentages, the times that I have been short changed is less than one percent and the times I have been threatened I can count on one hand.
I know that with the economy in the crapper, tips will definitely be down and clients will be coming a bit less often. However, I am fully booked today, 24 hours in advance no less. I will definetly be more careful during this time of recession. It can bring out the worst in people, but over all, I still believe in the goodness of all mankind.
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