The longer answer has to do with where my focus is. My focus is not on me but rather on the client on the table. I am doing all that I can to make sure he has the best time possible so he will give me a tip and come to see me again. It’s that simple. When you take the focus completely off yourself it is really easy not to have an orgasm. Now some will argue that when they are having sex and they are trying to get the other person to have an orgasm that they themselves often cum with slightest touch. This can be very true, however I am not really having sex, I am working. If the client is jacking me, he is doing it because it gives him pleasure; I am jacking him because it is my job. All the focus is on him. Granted it helps that I am not very sexually attracted to many of my clients. The issue for me is far more often how do I get an erection with a client rather than how to keep from cumming. I am proud to say I am still Viagra and Cialis free! As I have said before on this blog, I can usually find some aspect of the man on the table that is attractive. It may be a body part or his personality, but I can usually find something. Other times I will let the client play with my penis and close my eyes and fantasize (or recall) a sexy situation. If none of it works I realize that I don’t need to keep this man as a client.
Now on the rare occasion, I get someone incredibly hot on my table, who for whatever reason is really into me. This last part is important. If the hot guy on the table is not into me, I won’t be able to maintain an erection, much less come close to cumming. So, there is hot guy on the table who is really into me and wants nothing more than to make me cum. This is fortunately rare because these are the times I have to really use self-control. If I realize that the focus is changing from him to me and I am getting close to cumming I will focus on something else, anything else. Often times it is something in the room like “I should buy some new pots and dirt and replant some of these plants” or “When was the last time I washed those curtains” or “How did that scratch get into the floor and how can I fix it.” You get the idea. It works most of the time. Have I accidentally cum? Yes. It has happened. A couple of times from the expert jacking techniques of the client, a couple of times from seeing the client shoot a huge load and once or twice when the massage went out the window and I lost all control (I can count on one hand the number of times that has happened).
It is actually one of the things I am asked to teach my clients, how to have better cum control. It can be taught. Most of it psychological, taking the focus off your penis completely and focus on the partner completely. There can be physical aspects as well and the practice can be fun, it involves hours of masturbation. Day one of training I recommend cumming as many times as you can. Block out a day and get some good porn and lots of lube and stroke it all day long. Cum as quick as you want, but as soon as you are done, do everything you can to get that erection back and cum again and again and again. For 99% of men, each successive orgasm will take longer than the one before. Give yourself a day or two of rest and then do an all-day erection. The goal is not only to not cum, but to not even get close. The only goal is to remain hard. This is not the same as edging where you get as close to cumming as possible and then stop and restart but rather to just keep your dick hard for as many hours straight as you can. Give it the occasional stroke as you do naked housework, play your favorite games, read a non-sexual book or whatever non-orgasm inducing activity you can find. At the end of the day reward yourself by giving your penis complete attention and cum as big as you can. Rest a day or two and then you can do an edging day of getting as close to orgasm as possible and then stop let yourself go soft and start over. If you accidentally have an orgasm wait a couple of hours and start again. If you go through this 3 day cycle a few times in one month, you will be well on your way to total dick control. ;-)
- Jack
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