Exchanges and Contadictions

I had a massage exchange today. Professionals do that with each other every so often. It is a way for us to get a massage with out paying for it, and a chance for us to share our knowledge with each other. These are often sensual massages since there is no money changing hands so even they most conservative of masseurs will feel at ease and have a little fun.

I mention this because it was a very odd experience, from the moment I was contacted this was all odd.

I did the exchange with a therapist that I did not know. He contacted me first from an ad on the internet where I was advertising my “legit” bodywork. His first email to me was something to the effect of “hung top looking for sensual massage” to which I responded that he would probably be happier with someone else. I never take these guys who start off with “hung top” or “total bottom” since they are looking for a cheap hooker. He sends another email with "I just thought since you have a dick pic up that you were up for sensual massage." I freaked out, where the heck do I have a dick pic up? I looked at my sites and there were none showing, none on my profiles, where had he seen this? So I ask him and responds that it was a massage exchange site. OK, well that is a different thing all together, I explain that yes, I do sensual massage in exchanges with other professionals but the ad he responded to is for my paying bodywork. He informs me that he is professional LMT and was looking for a sensual massage and was willing to pay for it or to do an exchange. I think that I could really use a massage, great! We agree to meet for a sensual massage exchange, with the understanding that sensual meant that while we would both be nude, there would be no sexual intercourse other than manual release. I do a quick search for his info on the net and find that he was an LMT in California and apparently recently moved back in the area.

OK, so today we do the exchange. He is about 10 years older than I am with an average body, definitely a few extra pounds but not obese. None of us are perfect. We did it at my place where I am absorbing all the costs, towels, sheets, massage cream, bottled water, etc. Normally when I have done exchanges there is always a bit of discussion about who gives and who receives first. Everyone secretly wants to give the massage first and receive second since few people really want to hop off the table after receiving a great massage and have to go to work. The default answer is that the host will give first since they have set things up the way that they like them. The person who gives the first massage also sets the tone, expectations and the boundaries that will or will not be crossed. So this guy arrives and immediately starts taking off his clothes and jumps on the table, no chit chat. OK. So I disrobe as well and start giving him my best combination of Swedish, Deep Tissue and Sensual bodywork. I know that he is a total top from his first email, but since this is a hands only affair, the only thing that means to me is he may or may not enjoy work on his butt. From the beginning he is doing a lot of stroking of my legs and commenting how much he likes them. I give him a full 90 minute massage with the usual release about ¾ of the way through. He seems to really be into the sensual aspects and likes it when I am near his butt, so I include a fair amount of butt work and he tells me that maybe he is a bit of bottom after all. He is erect through most of the massage and there is plenty of mutual touch when we are working toward the release. He loves the release and is pretty spent. Fortunately for me that he will have a good 30 minutes or more to recover before we switch.

After I am finished with the massage, I start changing the sheets and he asks that we lower the table a few inches, so we flip it and lower each of the legs. I put on the new sheets and ask if he needs anything before I lie down, he assures me he does not and we start the massage. He asks if I need any special work and I tell him that my right shoulder has been a bit stiff. The massage he is giving is very deep tissue, he works both shoulders hard but not any more time on the right than on the left. So he couldn’t remember which one was stiff, it happens. It is obvious that he has had formal training, as a matter of fact the massage seems very familiar, like I have had this exact massage before from another therapist in my past somewhere. As he gets close to the old “no touch” zone I start getting erect but he ignores it and my butt. The massage is still very deep tissue with no sensual aspects yet. Well not everyone is into the release being ¾ of the way through, so I guess it will come at the end. I relax and the erection goes away. He is sweating on me, but that can happen. As he getting near the end of the massage I stroke his leg every so often but he seems to oblivious to it. He finishes the massage with a scalp massage and then says “I don’t believe in Happy Endings for massages, I hope that you are OK with that. I believe that you should just enjoy this moment.”

What the hell? What I am supposed to say? No, damn it, I want you to jerk me off? So I mumble the word fine and lie still to “enjoy the moment.” “Are you sure your fine?” Yes I say. “OK then, here’s your water.” So much for even enjoy the moment, there was no moment. I end a massage with an all over soft body touch, then a light toweling off and then cover the body with towels and leave the client in peace for a minute or two while I wash my hands and this is exactly what I did for him. He does none of this. Out of curiosity I glance at the clock, about 50 minutes had passed. I had given him a 90 minute therapeutic and sensual massage with a mind blowing orgasm and got 50 minutes of deep tissue in return with no sensual aspects. He then is dressed and out of there is seconds, no offer to help clean up or small talk, just out.

When will I learn? This is not the first time that I have had a disappointing exchange. My shoulder is still stiff as well. What really got my goat was that he came to me for a sensual massage but then says he doesn’t believe in giving one? What kind of freak is that? Talk about someone with serious problems.

There are a lot masseurs and body workers who never do exchanges for these very reasons. Unfortunately I can’t afford to get massages as often as I would like. So, life goes on. I take chances and I get disappointed. Not getting a great massage is not the end of the world. I was hoping that it would be great and I would have new exchange partner and perhaps even a new friend with whom I could talk to about the business, but whatever.

The really frightening aspect is that I am actually meeting someone in another week or so to do an exchange with, another stranger. Maybe this one will be better. Hope is springs eternal.

- Jack