Sharing an interesting Blog

http://beforeyoucome.blogspot.com/
On this Blog was some interesting information including the following. While I don't personally agree with everything here, there are some really good points, and I am quoted in it. - Jack


ADVICE FOR A GOOD EXPERIENCE WITH AN ESCORT OR MASSEUR

The following advice is a compilation of tips from Andre (Escort-Raleigh), Angel (Masseur-LA), Aaron Lawrence (Escort-NJ), Jack (Body Worker-MD), Marcus (Escort-DC), Rock (Masseur-DC), and Brett Silvers (Escort-LA).


- SETTING UP AN APPOINTMENT -

You are not Paying for Sex:
Realize that escorts and masseurs don't sell sex. Escorts sell their
time, not sexual acts. With escorts, what happens during your time
spent together is up to the two of you. It's that simple. As for
masseurs, they sell bodywork, whether it is a light rubdown, a
pressure point treatment, a hot-stone therapy, or a fully naked body-
to-body massage. If any other activity occurs beyond a massage,
during your time spent with a masseur, it has nothing to do with the
money you are paying him. It's that simple.

Since they do not sell sex, escorts and masseurs do not want to talk
with you about having sex with them. Not on the phone, and not face-
to-face, during your appointment. In order to enjoy the services of
an escort or masseur, you need to learn how to discuss their services
correctly. You can pretty much ensure a really bad experience with
any service provider if you ask him how much it would cost to have
sex with you.

The problem is that most people who attempt to associate sex with a
fee, when communicating with an escort or masseur, work for
government agencies or police departments. Or, they are soliciting
hookers. Making this fee/act association will scare a service
provider away, and thus, everybody loses. Avoid this mistake at all
costs and you will have a great new friend just a phone call away.

To avoid delays in communicating with a service provider, keep your
discussion light and fun. Mentioning "acts" might result in your
emails being ignored or your phone conversations cut short. However,
you CAN ask your service provider what he is into, sexually. Just be
sure to make it clear that you are asking this question with regard
to his personal life and lifestyle. There is nothing wrong with two
adults discussing similar likes, interests and what they personally
like in a sexual relationship.

Give Your Phone Number, if Asked:
If you refuse to give a phone number, then you are showing the
service provider that you are already being difficult. He may
conclude that the session might end up being the same way. Realize
that service providers rarely call clients, and if they do, they are
very discreet ("Hi, Mike? This is Jet. Can you talk right now?", or a
phone message left on voicemail like, "Hi, Mike, this is Jimmy.
Please call me when you have a minute.") This demonstrates respect
for privacy and discretion. There are far too many serious clients
out there; it makes no sense for escorts and masseurs to fool around
with someone who is withholding basic information like a phone number.
They are not going to harass you or spread your number around. The
fact is, most service providers are busy people who don't want to
waste their time with such activities.

If an escort or masseur is unable to determine that you are not a
form of oppressive puritan society, then they either will not see
you, or they take a chance on meeting an undesirable client, or a
member of some kind of harassing government agency. This just makes
everything less pleasant. If your service provider did not have to
deal with no-shows, police, or bad apples of any kind, this would not
be an issue. Simply stated, if you give him your phone number, he
will provide better service.

It is actually helpful for most service providers to get as much
information as you feel comfortable providing; including your first
name, your age, your height, your weight, and your general location.
They are going to learn all of this information anyway, so why not
get started on the right foot? It makes the whole process run a lot
smoother and faster.

The reason why service providers hate blocked numbers so much is NOT
because every private caller is calling to bullshit, but because
every bullshit call that they get comes from blocked numbers.

How Smart is He?
Uh... we dunno. But you might be surprised to find that many escorts
and masseurs are very well educated. A startling number of service
providers have advanced degrees, or speak several languages, and are
doing this sort of work by choice - because they LIKE it - and not
out of dire circumstances. This is wise to keep in mind as you speak
with him; he is probably not some downtrodden derelict who has
nothing else to turn towards. Speaking with him as a social equal
will undoubtedly result in a more pleasant exchange. And although it
seems obvious, don't end your phone call by hanging up without
saying "goodbye", even if what he offers is not what you want.

Don't Talk On and On:
An escort's or masseur's time is his commodity: it is literally how
he earns money. Spending time on the telephone talking about your
experience last year with some stud in Barcelona, or your theories on
gays, straights and bisexuals, may be interesting for both of you...
but unfortunately it takes up his time. Remember, many people hire
escorts or masseurs just for this reason; to be able to talk with
someone who can converse on subjects like these. Be considerate
regarding your conversations on the phone. Use the phone call to gain
information about his work, about him, and hopefully, to set up a
session. And save the discourse for your actual appointment.


- YOUR ACTUAL APPOINTMENT -

Arriving:
Do not arrive earlier than your appointment time. Many escorts and
masseurs are prepping to get ready for their session with you. By
arriving earlier than expected, you are rushing your service
provider, and potentially starting the appointment off on a bad note.
If you arrive a bit earlier than expected, wait in your car or
somewhere else (but not just outside his building, most service
providers are very discreet, and do not need people lurking about).

If You are Running Late:
Call the service provider, and tell him! It is just good manners to
stay in touch like that. Do not assume that if you are 15 minutes
late, you can add that time on to the end. If your appointment was
from 6pm to 7pm, and you are running 15 or 20 minutes late, then you
should still plan to be finished at 7pm. If the service provider
offers not to rush, that's fine, but it should ultimately be his
choice. He might have another appointment - even an hour later - and
in between he may need to eat a meal, or prepare in other ways for
the upcoming session.

Be Clean:
This means several things. Make sure your body is not smelly or
dirty. Make sure you are cleaned out, inside. Make sure your breath
is fresh. And make sure you're not totally drugged out, or drunk.

If He is Coming to Your Hotel Room:
If the service provider is meeting you in your hotel room, expect him
to go immediately to the bathroom to make sure there are no
additional "guests". Do not be alarmed by this. Sometimes clients
surprise escorts or masseurs by bringing a friend along without
warning (this is never a good idea!!) It can annoy or even scare
your service provider, and will destroy the mood. Upon finding no
unexpected guests, you can then expect him to lock all of the doors
in the room (including sliding glass doors or doors to adjoining
rooms). The time you have purchased is for you alone. With all the
doors locked, he will have a much easier time concentrating on you,
and you on him.

If He is in Your Place, Offer Him a Drink:
But only offer beverages to your service provider which are sealed in
bottles or cans. No escort or masseur wants to get dosed with any
kind of drug, or have to worry about it, so to avoid this, it's a
great idea to follow the sealed bottle/can rule. If he does accept a
beverage from you, expect him to drink it fast, or not to put the
container down until it's finished, due to the above reasons. Once
trust is established, or you're a repeat client, this will not be an
issue.

No "Clock Watchers", but Someone's got to Keep an Eye on the Time:
Clarify with the service provider who is to keep track of time.
Escorts and masseurs handle this in different ways, and direct, up-
front communication is best. This way you will know, if you go over
your paid time, whether or not you are expected to pay additional
moneys/fees. If YOU are to watch your time, then you should be ready
to pay an additional amount (should you go over). If HE is
responsible for keeping an eye on the time, you are in the clear.
Remember that escorts and masseurs work in a service industry like
any other, and their time, alas, is money.

Be Safe:
If you have a disease, or if something is unusual with your health,
tell him up front (ideally, on the phone or in email, before you
meet). This includes all kinds of health situations, from an open
cut, to an amputated leg, to warts, to a bloody hangnail...
hopefully, you get the point. Don't put the service provider at risk
for any STD without his full knowledge and consent. Moreover, do not
bareback without getting an OK. Contrary to what you may think, many
service providers do not bareback, ever! And just to be clear, do not
decide by yourself to remove a condom before a particular activity is
finished.

Don't Videotape or Photograph the Session Without his Consent:
You run the risk of your camera being confiscated, demolished, or
simply thrown out the window. You also run the risk of being
blacklisted in your community. And you can be absolutely sure the
service provider will never see you again.

No Drug Use:
Don't use drugs in the presence of the escort or masseur, unless this
has been previously discussed, or if it is a mutually agreed upon
activity.

Treat Him with Respect:
Just because you are paying does not mean you are the only one in
control. In fact, your appointment is not supposed to be about
control (unless a little leather is involved). DO NOT treat the
service person like an object. He is a human being, and he is making
his time available to you, as eye candy on your arm, a dinner guest,
a travel companion, a drinking buddy, a body worker, or what have
you. Treat him as you would have someone treat you, and you are
likely to have a hell of a lot more fun. The only time this doesn't
apply is during role-play, providing it is consensual.

A Couple Points for Couples:
Sometimes couples (husband and wife, gay partners, a man and his
mistress, etc) like to hire escorts or masseurs. Both people in the
couple might be actively involved with the service provider, or it
may be only one person within the couple. If you're in the latter
scenario, and one of you is planning to watch the session, do so with
a degree of sensitivity.

Find out if the service provider would prefer that the person
watching remain clothed, or undressed. Either way, don't watch from
too close of a distance: no one likes to feel like an animal in a zoo
(or an insect under a microscope!). And keep quiet... the session
should not involve you talking, if you are the one there to watch.
The activity, including conversation, should be between the service
provider and the person who is actively involved, unless previously
arranged otherwise.


- A HAPPY ENDING -

Don't Ask for Him to be Your Friend, or Boyfriend:
You can expect an escort or masseur to treat you professionally. He
sees you as a client, and perhaps as an "appointment-based friend".
He will not view you as his friend to hang out with for free, a buddy
to be with for movies or dinner, or his boyfriend/girlfriend. With
escorts and masseurs, you should not be looking for a friendship,
relationship, nor romance. Don't expect to get together without any
fees, and don't put the service provider in the uncomfortable
position of having to clarify the above directly to your face.

Pay as Agreed, and Then Some:
Pay the service provider what he originally asked for, and if you are
happy with the experience, go ahead and leave a tip, too.

All escorts and masseurs will tell you what they expect in pay,
before they get there. So don't make them ask you for money. Leave
the agreed moneys/fees on the dresser, bed, coffee table, etc. Leave
it in plain view, and expect the service provider to count it.
Wouldn't you, if your positions were reversed?

Realize that above all, this is a service-based industry. Even if he
absolutely loves what he is doing, he is still working hard to please
you. With a variety of clients, it truly is work, what with
anticipating each individual's likes and dislikes. You should ALWAYS
tip your service provider, even if it is a minor amount, unless his
service was truly awful. The fact is that everyone likes to be told
they are doing a great job, and this gesture, even if only ten or
twenty dollars, communicates that message. A GENEROUS CLIENT IS NOT
FORGOTTEN. You may have heard that "T.I.P." is an acronym for "To
Insure Promptness", but it can also mean "To Insure P_ _ _ _".

What could the "P" stand for? Hmmmm. It should be obvious. A good
tipper naturally gains PRIORITY when he or she wants another
appointment!

However you T.I.P., realize that tipping will undoubtedly result in a
better time for you. And for most people, that's what it's all about.